Sidewalk Eggs

Egg Tree News hits the streets of Orlando, FL to ask what YOU think:

Question: What is your resolution for the New Year?

-Amy Huizenga, 23 and broke: “To invent the world’s first invisible checkbook.”

-Richard Grund, local Reverend and total badass: “Takin care of business.”

-Cindy Anthony, Wicked Witch of Orlando East: “There’s no such thing as a resolution, in fact there’s no such thing as New Years. Wake up, sheeple! That’s a conspiracy theory started by the sheriff’s department. There’s NO evidence whatsoever to support it.”

-Jose Baez, Attorney, Mouth Breather: “My Revolution for the new year? Ya mean that flea and tick stuff for dogs? That reminds me, I gotta pick up some of that stuff. My pug, Caseymarie, is overdue.”

– George Anthony, Perverted Soulsucking Mooch and Worthless Imbecile: “What my wife said.”

– Andrea Lyon, Offensive in Every Way Imaginable: “I intend to start my own religion by the end of 2010.”

Advertisements

7 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by niecey456 on December 30, 2009 at 3:19 am

    Word has it Macaluso is planning on finding the “real killer” in 2010 too. LOL!

  2. Posted by eggtreenews on December 30, 2009 at 3:48 am

    Hiya Niecey! Ya, I can’t wait to see what kind of rabbit he pulls out of his hat in February!

  3. Posted by Jill from Western Australia on December 30, 2009 at 1:14 am

    Will Bozo be wearing his brown onesey?

    Hugs from your “over-pond” friend ♥♥♥

  4. Posted by Spacely on December 30, 2009 at 7:29 am

    Lee Anthony, professional he-he-he-he-er – “I’m taking some classes to help me learn when to laugh appropriately.”

    Dennis Milstead, professional scam artist, amateur cop impersonator – “I signed up for boating lessons.”

    Sherry Milstead, donation taker – “To get the major renovation of our headquarters underway so I can have a bigger bedroom.”

    Dr. Baden, professional bungler – “To stop letting the cat out of the bag by blurting out my personal knowledge of all the lies my wife tells.”

    Michelle Bart, hope-for-cash purveyor – “To provide hope to all parents of missing children everywhere by charging them ludicrous amounts of money for candles and posters for all the vigils we encourage throughout the year.”

  5. Posted by Spacely on December 30, 2009 at 7:36 am

    Jesse Grund, bad judge of female character – “I want to find a gf that pees inside.”

    Tony Lazzaro, pro partyier – “To stop banging chicks with kids.”

    Roy Kronk, unemployed internet junkie – “To hit my ex-gf and her kid with a Mr. T Mohawk Grenade in my fav virtual world.”

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: