Beauty Tips From the Egg Tree Salon and Spa

-Egg Tree Day Spa

Summer is but a few short days away, ladies. If you are squeamish about letting the glorious light of the sun shine upon you and all your beauty, take a trip to the Egg Treehouse Salon and Spa to be pampered. Our customized makeovers will leave you refreshed, rejuvenated, and most of all, beach ready. 

1. Let’s identify what scares us the most about bathing suit shopping. Is it your pasty, reflective skin that repels you from the bikini section of the department store? If you look like you have been moonbathing all winter long, or rolling in chalk like a dirty chinchilla, a good body scrub is in order. Slough off dead winter skin with a delicate mixture of ground walnuts, oats, honey, and sea salt, then moisturize with shea butter. Or just take a beltsander to your skin, and jump in a vat of Neosporin. It’s basically the same thing. 

2. Your dry winter hair deserves a deep conditioning treatment, followed by a fresh trim. Dunk your parched tresses in a basin of guacamole, mayo, and leftover bacon grease. Leave on for 30 minutes. Good luck rinsing out that mess. Lucky for you the “wet hair” look is all the rage this season. 

3. If you choose to sport open-toed shoes this summer, and your feet resemble weathered eagle tallons, for the love of all things sacred, do the world a favor and get a decent pedicure. Or at least dust the cobwebs off your nail clippers, and tackle those suckers yourself. Don’t be afraid to take some sandpaper to those calluses. And cover that fungus you’ve been cultivating with a more flattering shade of green polish. 

4. Because God is mean, he made the hot summer sun very dangerous for human skin. To reduce your risk of skin cancer, slather yourself in bronzer and stay in the basement until September. When you spot neighborhood children frolicking in the sprinklers during a heatwave, chuck water balloons filled with SPF 70 at them. They’ll thank you for it later. 

5. Enjoy having your face vaccumed by a screaming machine? Try a microdermabrasion facial! 

6. Lighter makeup colors are all the rage during the summer months. If yellows, oranges, and pinks do not flatter your skin tone, you should crawl in a hole and die. 

7. You don’t need expensive lip injections or plumping products to get the highly coveted Jolie effect. Just ask your BFF to punch you in the mouth a few times a week. A true friend’s work is never really done. If your BFF selfishly refuses to provide this service, take weekly trips to your local bee farm and kiss as many bees as possible. 

8. A day of sun, sand, saltwater, and booze is incredibly dehydrating to the skin, so when you have awoken from your drunken slumber, spit the sand out of your mouth, crawl your sunburned ass inside, and bathe in a tub full of aloe. If aloe is not available, wrap yourself in cold wet linens and crack open another cold one. It’s all gonna be alright. 

9. Thick, full eyelashes are very in at the moment. If you are an ugly subhuman unable to grow socially adequate lashes, and desire the additional effect of pigmented moley irises, try Latisse. If you would rather not compromise your vision, but still want to fulfill your lash destiny, keep it simple and use the falsies. Whatever the case, just know that society judges you based on your eyelashes. 

10. Avoid unhealthy habits that cause premature aging, such as smoking, drinking, and drugs. If you cannot kick these habits, grab time and gravity by the horns with the foolproof method of plastic surgery. An overstretched, immobile cat face will fool everyone. 


366 responses to this post.

  1. Hi Queen Egg!! Good to see you again Babe!! 🙂 Great post, AGAIN!!
    I know I am still guilty of having the Wisconsin fish belly white bread skin even though I’m out around noon every day trying to catch a tan to no avail. I give up, slather me with gravy, maybe that’ll work.
    Hello to all of the Egg tree followers that I have not talked to for awhile. I am sorry. I’m always out side doing something with the neighbors and my dog. I’ll be back.

    • Posted by GBPL on June 18, 2013 at 9:06 pm

      oh sooo good to hear from you too Carol!
      Outside is good!!! 😀

      • Hi GB! When the power was off last Sunday for six hours here in the sticks, I had a blast just stumbling around the neighborhood visiting and getting free drinks. I didn’t care if the power was ever coming back. Woo Hoo!! They don’t call this Party Lake for nothing.

        • Posted by Pfenix on June 19, 2013 at 6:58 pm

          Worst of that storm missed us, glad your doing well. Made drink specials in your honor last post, seems you were having your own drink special with the neighbors…Party Lake! Yup you were missed and whined about! Glad your back!

          • Hi Pfenix. I’m sorry I missed your birthday, belated regards please. You are a sweetie. New drink specials are always cool. You are a better barkeep then I am with the new drinks. I am sort of old school. Keep up the good work!

    • Good to see you, my lovely! 😆

    • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 19, 2013 at 1:56 am

      You’re ALIVE!! 😉 You were missed by all.

  2. Posted by GBPL on June 18, 2013 at 9:05 pm

    Soooooo true!!! On every level!!!
    I’ve never been able to grow socially adequate lashes, and at present that black crap I slap on them to appear bigger is blinding me from the laughter!

    I’ll think i’ll crack open another cold one and know its gonna be alllllright…
    sight or no sight! hehehhe!!!!

    • Fix those inadequate lashes at once!!! I’m embarassed to be associated with you!! 😆

      • Posted by GBPL on June 18, 2013 at 10:22 pm

        LOL…from your avatar, are you rockin’ falsies?!?! hehehe!

        If your embarrassed by my eyelash challenged lids….you’d be horrified by my dry skin/hair/ and cracked heels!!! hehehehe!

        Nahh… I’m not that dried up…but close! 😛

        • Posted by GBPL on June 19, 2013 at 7:23 am

          awwww I forgot to add that I may also have rickets from the lack of sunshine! 😉

  3. Posted by potatoes browning on June 18, 2013 at 9:10 pm

    Eggy: written in the spirit of hilarity-if conversat is a word then so is hilarity. After reading this and laughing a few times it makes one glad that summer is upon us…. and it accents the simplicity of being a guy. A barbeque seems in order.

  4. Great as usual Queen Egg and ohhhhhhh so glad to see you’re back Carol barkeep. We have fun but life is just not the same without the two of you!!!! Living in the south always presents problems in the summer. I’m not a sun lover as I tend to burn quickly so I avoid it especially after 9:00am. By that time, it really starts to heat up. I keep my hair short so it is quick and easy to fix. As it heats up so early, salty sweat rolls down the forehead, blinding g and burning the peepers. And make up, if you dare to put it on,(and I do) becomes waterlogged and it too doesn’t help the peepers. By noon, one only wants to go out if you have to and back in as soon as possible. I sweat profusely so I find bathing to be very comforting though my skin sometimes becomes prune like i don’t worry about eye lashes. But I do worry about MASKSKEETOES and FLIES as they are on a constant feed and if there’s water standing around, look out for West Nile virus. But the absolute worse is the humidity. It’s so bad you can’t breathe. Sooooo I stay inside mostly and this year I will be happier because I have found EGGTREE NEWS!!!! Thank you.

    • Hi Reba. Yes, the barkeep is still alive and kicking, thank you.
      When the temp gets to 89 or 90, you won’t see me outside unless I’m stuck on someone’s boat with a cooler. I hate humidity, it curls my leg hairs and I like the straight leg hair look better. Just kidding!!! lol!!

      • I’m so glad barkeep we have missed you! Your post about Jack Schitt and the Christmas poem are so funny (go to the Tree house in case you’ve forgotten where its posted). “It curls my leg hairs” line is so funny hehehehehe where do you and Queen Egg come up with your stuff? This site is amazing!

  5. Posted by Pam on June 18, 2013 at 10:02 pm

    That hit the spot. Thanks for some much needed comic relief!

  6. Wow, sounds like you must be in the DEEP south, huh?!

    I dont think I could deal with that kinda humidity. Im used to a cool Oregon climate. Worst thing here is the rain, and I love rain. We have the occasional heatwaves in the summertime, but for the most part its a nice climate.

    • I’m right I the mid section, Arkansas! Oldsouthernwoman knows all about it, she’s in the next state east. They get it too! You get somewhat used to it and learn to deal with it. I would love to see Oregon and we would love that rain especially in August our hottest month. I follow the Oregon Ducks in sports, one of my favorite teams.

      • We tend to get summer thunderstorms here, so it can be mildly muggy, but nothin like you’re used to. And it’s over really quick, then goes back to a decent temp. I’m originally from California, so I’ve never experienced “hot wet blanket humidity.” i would very likely pass out. 🙂 I’m such a lightweight…

        • I cannot see you as a lightweight. I can’t see you as a lightweight at anything. I do not even think about what you may look like nor any of my EggTree friends but its nice to have these conversations with EggTweeters we don’t even know and enjoy everyone for what’s in the mind. There’s no judgement on looks , money, what you wear or drive just all inclusive. I do however now however have an idea of the things you go through to maintain your beauty.

      • Ah yes, summer in the south. We don’t have mosquitoes here, we have Skeeters!!!! They are homicidal and like getting swatted! For our beauty routine here in the mountainous regions of Tennessee, we exfoliate with a bag of grits, slather on a layer of lard and sit on the porch fannin’ and drinkin’ sweet tea. On special occasions we add a little “shine to the tea. Oh hell, sometimes we just leave out the tea. If you drink enough of that, everybody looks beautiful! At my age, the most I can hope for is to look humanoid. I spent way too much money on this “miracle youth cream” about four years ago. I used it for three weeks and waited for my precious codger to notice my young self. I couldn’t stand it anymore so I casually mentioned I was using a new face cream. He asked me how it was working. I said it evidently wasn’t, got up, went out to the porch and poured me a glass of sweet tea-minus the tea!

        • AH,HAHAHA!! Love it Old! You are a hoot and a half!! ‘Slather’ is a great word isn’t it?
          You need one of those new tennis racket Skeeter killers. It has a battery in it with wires across the racket part that fry’s anything you hit with it. Really works!
          At least you can hope the Skeeters get drunk if they bite you first, then die. 😉 We don’t want PETA to object, the bastards.
          Moon shine is the saving grace by far. Wish I had a gallon. 😉

          • I might be tempted to use the swatter on precious codger. this man is really the love of my life. He says he can do almost anything “in the shop” and he really can. when I had cataract surgery he told the doc he could’ve done it in the shop and saved money. He also is addicted to duct tape. I have been hinting that I would like a face lift while I still had decent skin to lift—–he said he could do it in the shop with a little duct tape. Soooo, I gave myself a “lift” with some duct tape as a joke one night—man, I tightened myself up till I looked Chinese! It would have looked real good before I had my cataracts out, but the joke was on me when I tried to get that crap off my face and hair!!!! I pulled a “Wilmott” on myself. Oh, and by the way, in a beauty emergency DO NOT use a snakebite kit suction cup to pop a zit or blackhead. It takes a long time for the facial crop circle to disappear………..

            • ” bag of grits and a slather of lard, duct tape face lift, tea without the tea just a little shine”, truely southern aren’t you? Hehehehehe glad to call you friend and HICK lol

        • Posted by Pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 12:26 pm

          Here’s cold cream you can slather on and get rid of that radioactive dirt. Classic 50’s

          • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 1:04 pm

            Ahhhh, the good ole days:)

          • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 25, 2013 at 2:04 pm

            Looks like she’s shopping in a mink stole! Have to admit….I use cold cream as an ingredient in my own concoction for cleansing cream.

            • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 25, 2013 at 7:24 pm

              That’s oddly intriguing..what is that concoction, if you don’t mind sharing..?

              • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 11, 2013 at 12:16 pm

                Any sort of liquid facial cleanser (I switch around depending if my skin is dry or oily – whatever I feel like trying that’s on sale) and a dab of cold cream. The cold cream is a good deep cleaner. Know this is way after you asked….but I’m reviewing notes as part of my own summer beauty/spa plan and saw this.

  7. Thanks for all the tips Eggy, sadly this olde chooky is beyond repair :mrgreen:
    Lovely to see you back Carol.

  8. Ahh, thank you for the many recommendations. I think I prefer some unused Pennzoil to the Neosporin – they’re the same….right?

    • Posted by Pfenix on June 19, 2013 at 7:04 pm

      Saw on TLC where the Gypsy sisters in West Virginia used motor oil as sunbathing oil. Think that would attract guys into NACAR?? Nice to know that some things still can shock me.

  9. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 19, 2013 at 1:59 am

    ROFL Yes, I actually DID roll in chalk, and I admit to being a dirty chinchilla. No need to rub in the fact that I glow like an way overdone tooth whitening. 🙂

  10. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 19, 2013 at 2:19 am

    …and this blog is my favorite thing about the Jodi Arias trial. Blessings on whoever posted the link I followed.

  11. Posted by sharon on June 19, 2013 at 5:57 am

    You made my morning Eggy….and the return of Carol made it even better.

  12. Eggy; You bring a whole new meaning to the word funny ((-:

  13. Posted by Lee Wright on June 19, 2013 at 7:01 am

    Hi, High Queen Eggy, so happy to have your latest post, splitting my sides with your pearls of wisdom about how to deal with the summer do’s and don’t….. I never realized that all the beauty secret ingredients could be had right here in the kitchen, that would save me a boat load of cash at Walmart ‘s beauty section….. love the tips about the eye makeup, unfortunately even using my 15x magnifying mirror, I could no longer attach fake eyelashes, those days are gone, I would probably end up sticking them up my nose, I have to hold the mirror in one hand to get close to my face, so its a balancing act to apply glue and aim at my eye area, thats just not gonna happen. As I live in Arizona we have 8/9 months of “summer” and it started weeks ago, the average temperature is about 100 deg. at the moment, so when it gets “hot” its around 110/115 every day, my way of dealing with it is, go shopping as soon as it gets light, run into the store grab what you can, run back to the car so that you can still put your hands on the steering wheel and avoid having to put gloves on to turn the key. I might try the guacamole, bacon fat, mayo, instead of moisturizer, if it works one the hair, why not on the face…. worth a shot…. anyway have to go, have lots of stuff to mix, plus its getting light, got to go.

    • I have friends in Az. I watch the temp out there and I don’t know how you stand it. I think the only difference there and here is the humidity as you have a dryer. Doctors here used to recommend people with lung disease move to Az.. My uncle did that and he actually did get better. But the HEAT oh my!

      • Posted by Lee Wright on June 19, 2013 at 9:19 am

        Hey Reba, your right people used to be advised to come to Arizona for their health, but there is a downside, you can actually catch Valley Fever which is caught because of the spores in the dust, gets in your lungs, its no joke, I had it about 5 years ago and it lays you out for months…..don’t recommend it for anyone!

        • Really? Bet that doesn’t help anyone with COPD. Saw on the news today there is a pretty bad wildfire out there somewhere. That wouldn’t help the lungs either. Have driven through Az going to California and couldn’t believe the flat dry land. The dust must be incredible.

  14. Made my day seeing something new from Queen Eggy and Carol. No Zimmerman blog? Can’t blame you… there’s not much humor to be found in that tragedy. Always looking forward to some more sick comedy from you no matter the subject, you crack me up. Stay well

    • Posted by Pfenix on June 19, 2013 at 7:10 pm

      Zimmerman…Oh, HELL no! That’s a riot waiting to happen, should know I drove through rioting in LA during the Rodney King verdict…you would understand literally what it was like to be in a war zone.

      Zimmerman is an ASS anyway…when the police tell you NOT to chase a suspect…SHUT UPl. LISTEN, and stay IN the CAR!! When you jump to conclusions with a hand gun, someone is going to DIE.

  15. Posted by Marnie Paige on June 19, 2013 at 12:46 pm

    Thank you Egg! Now I can get started on my summer beauty program. And now that Carol is back and if she opens the bar I can drink myself into believing I actually look good. Gotta run…time to slather something somewhere.

  16. Posted by jenners on June 19, 2013 at 2:56 pm

    Yippee! I’m so eggcited! Love this blog and it’s unusual group of scrambled eggs.

  17. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 19, 2013 at 5:31 pm

    I’d love to read the Eggtree’s tips for vacation/summer wardrobe!

    • Heeheeheeeeee!!!

      • Posted by Pfenix on June 19, 2013 at 7:13 pm

        YES! Flipflops…ug can’t wear. Tube tops! Butt fat hanging out the bottom of shorts or back fat looking like back boobs in a tank..or anything else you might see at Wal-Mart that causes fashion acid reflux. Pleeeezzzzzzeee Eggy!

        • Phenix, ya know what gets my goat are the young pregnant girls that wear the tight fitting tops and regular jeans that are open on the top. Yea, we get that you are pregnant. How uncomfortable are those jeans for crying out loud? Geez, buy a clue and get some decent clothes.

    • That would be wonderful, how about it Queen Egg?

      • Don’t forget about the always spiffy muu-muu in neon colors with matching sunhat. You can see mine from space!

        • Old, you must look like the Nancy Grace from Tenn. with the shiny, glaring clothes that could stop the Hubble telescope in it’s tracks! LOL! Good for you damnit! 🙂

        • Posted by Pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 12:47 pm

          OSW I bet your rock your muu-muu. These guys though gives all us ladies a run for our money.

  18. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 20, 2013 at 1:11 pm

    Ahh Stabby’s back in court, and I had to laugh because she’s in her “Correctional Couture” of stripes…and you just KNOW that chapped her ass!

  19. But seriously, I like the facial mask that you smuck and slather all over your face and wait till it dry’s and then peel it off. You end up with baby butt smooth skin. 🙂 It scares the hub though. Ah, the price of beauty.
    Men don’t have to do a stinking thing to look good. They get a haircut, shave and shower and they’re all set and good to go. Creeps.

  20. Posted by Cindy Lou on June 20, 2013 at 4:51 pm

    Say, where is Ria??

    • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 21, 2013 at 3:37 am

      LOL Oh no, we finally locate one, and another goes MIA! Maybe she hasn’t seen the new post?

    • ((((Ria, Ria, come in Ria))))))) The band is back together, we need you!!

      • Posted by GBPL on June 21, 2013 at 12:25 pm

        the band is back together! LOL!!! 😀 😀 😀

        Sully hasn’t been seen for awhile either! 😦

        (((( Sully….come in Sully!!!))))

    • Oh, Ria, the bar is open…… 🙂 Come on down!

      • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 5:14 am

        Carol, you’re back!!! Cindy Lou, my in-laws were with us for a week, they left yesterday so I’m feeling kind of blue now:( But so glad to see a new post from Queen Eggo to cheer me up!

  21. Posted by Tanis Comer on June 20, 2013 at 8:32 pm

    Ha ha!
    Love you egg! Born and raised in So Cal and at 63 it shows!
    Number 10 all the way. I give up

  22. LOL!! Just gotta say – one nice thing about being old and married is that you quit worrying about your looks 24/7. Thanks egg for another good laugh!

    • So true sheronw—–but now I’m worried about the way my precious codger looks! I hate his t-shirts from the 60’s, you know the ones—-pot smoking woodland creatures on a tie-dye background. I didn’t notice what the frog was actually doing at first, I just thought he supported nature. He does…………….it’s just not the nature I thought it was. Somebody needs to tell older men that nylon basketball shorts do not look HOT! My PC is a big man—well over 6 feet and stocky. His shorts could be on a yacht in the America’s Cup race. I have bought him some very nice “senior preppy” clothes, but noooooooooo, Tie dye ( he has every color family) and the nylon shorts come out every day . I can’t really say anything because he at least uses them for at home wear and sometimes to work on the boat. And, I have given up my neon muu-muu with matching hat! After the comment that I look like a Tennessee Nancy Grace, I threw up in my mouth and sent them to Goodwill. I expect Goodwill to send them back—Good Night Friend.

      • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 22, 2013 at 6:01 pm

        What a good way to end my day – with a “good night friend” and out loud obnoxious laughing as I sit by myself with the rest of the household wondering what in the hell I’m up to.

        My own codger (he’d DIE if he knew I called him that! Only here among friends can I say that with ease) wears the same 2 t-shirts all week. He has many others and other nice shirts with collars but prefers those 2 – and also rotates the same 2 pair of shorts until they are threadbare – with a closet of nice shorts that I sometimes even iron for him. Tie-dye might even spice up the mix a little! He also has another favorite I just remembered – “Blind Tiger Pub – We Separate Church and State” – wears that beauty proudly like we’re regulars at that place. I’m not even sure what the slogan means in reference to that bar.

        Good night friends! Love it OSW – as well as the description of your glow in the dark muu-muu. You are hilarious.

      • Ahh, Old, I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings, I’m sorry.
        What I do with the hub’s old T shirts that I can’t stand is splash too much bleach in the wash cycle. Whoops!! I’m blonde, sorry.

        • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 23, 2013 at 8:04 am

          Great idea Carol! I’m blonde too so I might have to try little misstep with the bleach! Glad to have you back….you were greatly missed.

          • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 23, 2013 at 8:23 am

            Ladies, ladies. When will you ever learn. Your efforts are valiant, but utterly useless. Women from the dawn of time have schemed in vain to class up their men’s look. Back in the cavemen day, wives were like, OMG is he going to wear that same old leopard loin cloth again, you can totally see his but crack when he bends over!!!

            • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 23, 2013 at 8:36 am

              Didn’t Jerry Seinfeld do a whole shtick on how all men dress how the they did in the last good year of their life, like the year after high school or whatever. Think about it. It does explain a lot of unfortunate wardrobe choices. And girls, we know we all basically wear the same hair and make up since the 12th grade. Ouch. That explains the blue eyeshadow.

              • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 24, 2013 at 4:30 pm

                Wise words for sure. Might as well give up – for the umpteenth time.

        • Carol, I tried accidently ruining his worst shirt in the wash——he liked it! It didn’t hurt my feelings to be compared to NG.I stopped getting hurt feelings in 2003.

          • Ok, Old, I’ll bite… What happened in 2003?

            • Nothing actually, it just sounded cryptic, mysterious, and a lot more interesting than I really am. I taught sixth grade for 30 years, I don’t have any real feelings left!

              • AH,HAHAHAHA!!! You are so funny! You really deserve a gold star for every year teaching. We applaud your efforts! I wouldn’t have the patience for one hour of ‘those’ people.

              • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 24, 2013 at 4:32 pm

                No wonder you have such a good sense of humor. 30 years teaching any grade is monumental.

  23. Posted by Barb on June 22, 2013 at 1:40 pm

    Life as I knew it is back to normal! Eggy and dear Carol are back. There was a void while the two of you were MIA. I am beyond the beauty tips. My idea of a beauty regimen these days is 110 sunscreen so my nose doesn’t fall off one day and the usual splash of lipstick that lasts 5 minutes if I am lucky. I used a little purple eyeliner for some pizazz the other day and the receptionist at the dentist asked if I had a bruise around my eye! Well, that attempt flopped didn’t it?
    Can’t sign off without mentioning Jodie just once. Does anyone know who the man with her parents in court is? She was smiling large as he blew kisses to her! Check it out-–212569261.html
    Hope the link works! Not good at attaching links!

    • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 22, 2013 at 6:04 pm

      Am sickened. Just more class from the Arias bunch. At least they escorted him out! Blowing kisses? Another Arias supporter freak.

      • Posted by pfenix on June 24, 2013 at 3:43 pm

        Instead of a Stage Door Johnny, he is a Jail House Johnny.
        Fame Whore
        Star Fxcker Wanna Be
        Just Damn Sad and Sick

        The only male I want to see in JoDie’s court is Juan kicking her and her dumbscum defense Dumbo’s.ass. ¡Vete y dadles caña!

    • Barb you did good, got the link without any trouble! Thanks

      • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 22, 2013 at 8:55 pm

        Another picture to make me ask myself, “what do men SEE in Jodi?”

        • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 23, 2013 at 8:05 am

          I ask that every time I see a pic. Don’t get it – must be some sort of bizarre hormone she sweats.

        • Posted by pfenix on June 24, 2013 at 3:45 pm

          Easy lay or maybe it’s when she rocks those Fang Bangs…so gothic.

  24. Eggy! Please, we need some Stabby Hate. There’s so much to work with. No glasses in court, clanking ’round with shackles, smiling her crooked tooth (those old photos of her WERE photoshopped by her to have perfect teeth) grin, her puffy face, her stare down of the alternate juror, and her freakin’ tweets. why does Twitter allow a convicted felon to have an account? That just seems wrong!

    xo from colorado

    • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 22, 2013 at 6:06 pm

      Those teeth! Am on the same wavelength with ya! Big jutting out eye teeth. She should simply keep those puffy lips of her closed.

      • Stabby thinks she has beautiful lips, full and like some actress. I can’t remember where I read or heard that, maybe on her blog or her posts on Travis’ myspace page…i got really deeply into the comment section. Interesting reading. Well. Now. Now it’s interesting. Fascinating actually, like in the I can’t stop looking at the gore kind of fascinating. No reference intended.

        • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 23, 2013 at 8:07 am

          I think she told Travis that their future children would have lips that Angelina Jolie would envy! Idiotic. The killer’s lips are true smackers for sure – reminiscent of the bright red wax ones we goofed around with (I still do if I can find them – great prank gifts.)

    • Posted by pfenix on June 24, 2013 at 3:47 pm

      Stabby Hate, Bwaaahahahahahahahaha

  25. Y’all I just watched the movie ” Dirty Little Secret ” it was pathetic! I could do better with my little cell phone video and I know I could pick better actors. Compared to the real people, these folks were duds! I could have acted each character myself. They should have left this thing in the CAN. It was soooooooo pathetic!!!!!! If you didn’t watch, you did yourself a favor!

    • Damn. I was hoping for some sort of good surmising value? None? Like not even I’d like to see how they orchestrate the murder? Not even that? (It’s just so soon to be so analytical about the whole thing with the scab just getting picked over and over for the family.)

      • The murder began as Travis had his back to Stabby with his hands on the shower wall. She began stabbing him in the back. ( that was the way I thought it may have happened. I was never convinced she stabbed him in the chest first. Doesn’t make medical sense to me, back was more likely.) the murder scenes were the best part of the movie to me. I read a review and they thought it was good. I guess I’m just used to the real thing lol.

        • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 22, 2013 at 9:43 pm

          Knowing how brutal the murder truly was, I had a difficult time watching that part. It really is the only part they got right. (or as close to as possible)

        • So you think she got him to stand up again after the seated photograph, and got him as he faced his back to her, then he turned and got the defensive wounds, when did he get to the sink? when did the heart stab happen? I only thought heartstab first when seated because I couldn’t work out the sink standing and coughing without the heartstab having happened (blood in the lungs). I’m in medicine too, but veterinary medicine. Damn, I just wish Stabby would stand up in court one day and Yell I did it and here’s how it went down.

          • I think she stabbed him in the back first. I’m not sure about the time on the sitting photo but it is plausible that he go up , had his back to her , she stabbed, he turned she stabbed him in the chest, he put up an effort to defend himself. He then made it ti this sink where she continued stab him in the back. I don’t think he could have been sitting when she stabbed him and got his vena cava for two reasons: 1.. She would have had to cross over his body to make the stab. I think he would have noticed as she came across his right chest. That would have created an angle. 2.. Had she severed his Vena Cava with the first stab, I think the volume of blood loss would have been too much for him to have put up a defense, move to the sink cough cough etc. it wouldn’t have taken him that long to bleed enough to be faint and near incapable of dragging himself to the bedroom where she cut his throat. He put up quite a defensive battle after the Vena Cava was severed I don’t think he would have had the energy to fight that hard if she got him in the chest first and then he had to stand. Also, did he have blood in chest cavity? I never heard anyone say or I missed that part. I read the autopsy report and it was never mentioned that.

            • I’m sorry, my life has been in medicine so I forget sometimes everyone doesn’t understand the terminology . For those who don’t know, the Vena Cava is the largest vein in the body. It runs throughout the trunk and all other major veins arise from it. It runs along side the Aorta which is the largest artery in the body. Veins carry unoxygenated blood back to the heart to be pumped to the lungs to pick up oxygen. Major veins arising from the Veina Cava significant to this case is the jugular vein which Stabby cut when she sliced his throat. The aorta, being an artery carries oxygenated blood back from the heart to the rest of body. Arising off the Aorta is the carotid Arteries which is the arteries feeding the brain. It is this you feel when you feel the pulsation in the neck. Significant here because Stabby severed this artery as well when she cut his throat. Both the stab into the Vena Cava and the slicing of the throat would have caused death very rapidly. The reason we know the gunshot was last, is because there was no blood in the tissue or around the area of the entry. The face and head are extremly vascular therefore bleed profusely. This wound had no blood because there was no pumping of the heart going on. Ok done. Anatomy lesson finished.

              • Also, bleeding that profusely, Travis’ B/p would haver dropped rapidly and his heart rate would have gone up quickly. As he continued to lose volume, he would have become short of breath. The SOB and rapid heart rate would have caused him so much distress. I’m amazed he was able to drag himself as far as he did. The gun shot wound , had it came first, would have caused neurogenic shock. If he was able to do anything, he would have been dazed and probably very confused. I don’t believe Travis would have been able to go after Stabby as she claims. None of it makes sense except she butchered him. Last post about my assessment of how it happened. Thanks for Putin’ up with me.

                • Posted by Pfenix on June 24, 2013 at 8:30 pm

                  Mom’s a nurse, I hear you. You observations are spot on, and back up the defenses claim he was shot last. You get a small cut on you face (nose or scalp) and you bleed profusely, a bullet in the head, yeah that would bleed like hell in the tissue.

                  The blood in the chest, would think there would be some, but the murder was done quickly and with the throat slit the way it was, and the area at the end of the hallway had so much blood, that’s where most of it seems to pump out. Thinking she slit it as he was face down, then flipped him over and dragged him back down the hall (thanks to the best photo she ever took). If she had dragged him back on his stomach I think that would have help decapitate him.

                  Sorrow for Travis, that worthless demoness needs to die…soon.

    • Posted by pfenix on June 24, 2013 at 3:51 pm

      Only had to look at the movie stills to know how cheaply made it was. Yes I would LOVE to see your version Reba, Get the family and the neighbors and put on a cell phone movie…it would probably be better. Let us know when you post on

    • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 5:18 am

      I recorded it and just watched it this morning…I’m ashamed to admit this but…I liked it!!! I think it did a good job of portraying how extremely sexually aggressive she was.

  26. And y’all, the story, Stabbie’s lies were more believable and her acting put them under the bus!

  27. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 22, 2013 at 8:52 pm

    Thry didn’t even follow the facts. It’s not like they were hard up for material, yet they STILL made a crappy movie!

  28. I’m glad you agree, I was thinking I might be the only one not liking it after reading the review.

  29. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 22, 2013 at 9:48 pm

    OMG ROFL The Det. Flores character is TERRIBLE!!

    • They have him speaking with an accent! And while the prom queen may have had difficulties with her bald spot, she looks a heck of a lot better than they had her in this pic. And the Jaun character had no energy at all. They could have at least tried to be true to the real people.

    • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 5:19 am

      He had some sort of speech impediment, he couldn’t say his R’s. The Homecoming Queen was hilarious looking!!!

  30. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 22, 2013 at 11:59 pm

    I know!! WTF was on her head anyway? Looked like some kind of dead animal…

    • Posted by GBPL on June 23, 2013 at 6:13 am

      It really did! I just caught the last part of it…but it was more like a spoof than a lifetime movie! Wow.

      • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 23, 2013 at 7:36 am

        It truly was. Also, from the mountain of facts and evidence already available to the public at the time shooting on this movie began, it is pathetic how many things the writers got wrong or changed to make the story “flow” better. I’m just curious how changing the amount of siblings Travis had, or the whole relationship with the brunette “Marie Hall” character (who seemed an amalgam of Lisa Andrews and Marie Hall, with a dash of every other girl TA ever dated) could possibly help the storyline?

    • I don’t have a clue yuk yuk yuk. Couldn’t we have done better?

    • Posted by pfenix on June 24, 2013 at 3:53 pm

      The hair from the wig came from a corpse…I just know it.

  31. Posted by Marnie Paige on June 23, 2013 at 8:15 am

    I have to admit I intentionally didn’t watch. Was afraid Stabby would be portrayed favorably as well as her defense cronies. Nice to hear all the Egg tree reviews and details though – better than having to watch even a poor portrayal of the story.

  32. OK, I watched it. Still doesn’t hold with the time stamps on the photos to have him getting stabbed in the back on the back photo (head on photo followed back photo), plus he was all folded up in the foot of the shower and turning toward her, I think that’s when she got him (that photo of his body with his back tot he left shows blood under his butt, I just can’t figure out how he got up, got to the sink, then got down the hallway with 28 stab wounds in him. or less. or any.
    Movie review: meh.

    • I thought that was blood under his butt too but someone in court said that was a shadow and I can’t really tell. Like you I wish Stabby would just tell us why and how. She won’t do that because she’s going to appeal everything. Maybe she’ll tell one of her cell mates and they’ll tell.

      • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 25, 2013 at 2:17 am

        I have no clue whether the chicken came first or the egg, I just meant they got the visciousness of the murder scene right. I personally think Travis was stabbed in the chest first, after the lower torso shower pic like the state theorized. I believe Dr Yummy said the stab wound to the vena cava wouldn’t have been immediately incapacitating, allowing Travis time to stumble up and out of the shower, and eventually over to the sink. (but I was too busy having impure thoughts about him to really listen to his testimony. Thank goodness the entire trial was posted on YouTube!) Stabby likely believed she’d wounded Travis to the point where he wasn’t a physical threat to her (she did, and he wasn’t) which is probably why she allowed him to get past her and out of the shower at all. That and shock that she actually stabbed him. (shock,… NOT shame) The only threat posed at that point was if he escaped, or managed to raise enough of a ruckus to bring nosy neighbors to his house. Based on the rainbow shaped blood smear along the wall leading to the bedroom door, either the internal bleeding from the stab wound caught up with him there…or Stabby did. That only left him with one option: to scream, and I think THAT is why she cut his throat. (then the gunshot as an after thought- possibly to set the stage for her “ninja” story) Of course, I have no prestigious alphabet soup after my name, making these just the opines of an armchair quarterbacking observer.

        • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 6:51 am

          Everything you wrote makes sense Jen. So gruesome but she probably did give the slice to throat to get him to stop making noise. She’s one sick woman!

          • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 25, 2013 at 1:40 pm

            Agree she cut his throat to silence him from either trying to speak or making nasty, end stage gasping/gurgling sounds. “OK Travis, I’ve killed you but please don’t subject me to the sound of it.” I’ve heard people say how difficult it is to actually cut someone’s throat. To me that shows horrific evil.

        • Who knows how she did it? Stabby will never let us know and how could we believe her even if she told the story without her forked tounge? I did like the way they set Stabby up as evil as they did, they got that right. Jennylyn, your theory is great and Dr. Yummy did say that and he was Yummy. I think we’ll see him again in the next phase so we can drool all over! Hope we don’t have to wait till Jan.

  33. Posted by Barb on June 23, 2013 at 3:59 pm

    I wasn’t going to watch the movie initially for fear they would make Stabby seem vulnerable or likeable but decided to see how things unfolded. While they took a little creative license with the story I think they nailed Jodie’s weird evil vibes. I also hope the misguided 4 (jurors) watched it and got to see the evil they may have set loose by not giving the ultimate penalty. Just sayin……

    • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 23, 2013 at 7:24 pm

      …what we’re all thinking.

    • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 6:53 am

      I really enjoyed the movie! I know several others have posted that they didn’t like it but I think they did such a good job of showing how assertive Stabby was when it came to sex and I think the guy who played Travis was very good. He had that playful, sarcastic personality nailed pretty well.

  34. Posted by Pfenix on June 24, 2013 at 8:16 pm

    Moonbather….pfffffffftthh. I am Queen of the Moon, white skin so lite I glow, my insides cold, dark and mysterious like the moon.

    Oh the drama! Seriously I glow white in photos, if I was any whiter my eyes would be pink and I’d call myself albino girl. A college nurse asked me if I was pregnant, no not because of the freshman 15, because I was so white…it was natural.

  35. Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 5:23 am

    Yay, a new Eggo post! We moved to Florida a year ago and the humidity takes some getting used to. If I attempted fake lashes I think they’d melt off.

    Thank you for the morning laugh Queen Eggo!!! And Carol, it’s so good to have you back!

    • Posted by pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 10:09 am

      OMG Ria from dry heat to humidity…how’s that working for you? Melt like a delicate flower in humidity. Although Florida in the winter is sweet, have family in Orlando and Miami…FUN!

      • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 10:39 am

        It takes some getting used to, that’s for sure. I’ve learned how to put concealer on over a layer of facial sweat though:) Only to sweat it all off half an hour later. We went to Miami last year, it’s amazing there!!!

        • Posted by pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 11:55 am

          The concealer…right with you Ria! Miami is so fun, South Beach where they constantly film shows, the sky is incredible just like in CSI Miami.

          • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 25, 2013 at 1:57 pm

            Florida is so extraordinarily beautful. Yes, the humidity is fierce, but at least you have the benefit of BEING SOMEPLACE AWESOME! Not like my state of Alabama. The humidity is hellish, and no other good reason to exist here!! Florida is like torture to us Alabamians. It’s so tantalizingly close, it’s what we’d like to be, and yet, so not!

            • Posted by pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 6:22 pm

              Used to live there Cindy Lou, I moved down there in the month of August. Yeah, pure torture! Well the Florida panhandle cuts off most of shoreline under Alabama. Not sure how Bama’ got screwed on that one.

              • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 25, 2013 at 6:27 pm

                I know, right??!!

                • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 11, 2013 at 12:26 pm

                  Cindy Lou, I have to say I like Alabama. Remember, it’s “where the skies are so blue.” That little bit of gulf shore area is beautiful.

          • Posted by Ria on June 26, 2013 at 8:49 am

            I love the summer thunderstorms that roll in every afternoon:)

  36. Ria! My cyber Friend! Great to see you again too!! 🙂
    Visiting relatives are like fish after three days – they stink!
    I’ll be in and out today – car repairs – suckage. 😦 At least the hub is home today with his car.

    • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 10:42 am

      Carol!!! I am so glad to see you back!!! You were greatly missed but we did our best to behave ourselves while you were gone:)

      I actually got very lucky in the in-law department, they’re awesome and my MIL and I laugh together til we’re crying. But, they do not drink so today, the bar is OPEN for moi! I’ve got some catching up to do:)

  37. Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 10:43 am

    I’m on my third viewing of “Dirty Little Secret” today…is that bad?

    • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 25, 2013 at 1:44 pm

      Yes, that is very, very bad. That’s what we like about you.

      • Posted by Ria on June 26, 2013 at 8:40 am

        I forced my husband to watch it with me again when he got home from work:)

        • Posted by Pfenix on June 27, 2013 at 4:04 pm

          That would make my dad run screaming from the house if my mom asked him to watch it.

          • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 11, 2013 at 12:29 pm

            My husband would be snoring within 3 minutes – if I could even get him to agree to sit and watch.

  38. Posted by pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 11:52 am

    Hey Carol, Chicks, and Peeps,

    Belly up to the bar for today’s drink specials dedicated to beauty tips!

    SPF 100
    Malibu® coconut rum, Hot Damn cinnamon schnapps

    Sun Tan Lotion
    Top with ginger ale, Malibu® coconut rum, Smirnoff® vodka Vanilla, pineapple juice
    grenadine syrup

    Sunburn Cocktail
    White rum, Strawberries, Oranges, Bananas, Grenadine

    For RIA: Angry Sunburned Floridian
    vodka, orange juice, grenadine syrup

    Full Moon-Moonbather’s Delight
    Orange Curacao liqueur, Amaretto almond liqueur

    Cream, Rum, Coffee Liqueur

    Face Melter-Microdermabrasion
    Bacardi® 151 rum, Absinth® absinthe herbal liqueur, Tabasco® sauce

    Bleeding Surgeon
    1 shot rum (dark), 1 slice orange, 1/2 glass cold citrus soda, 1/2 glass cranberry juice

    Dark rum, White rum, Malibu, Cola

    Jagermeister, White rum, Cola

    Flip Flop
    Malibu® coconut rum, light rum, pineapple juice, orange juice

    Eyelash Cocktail
    Vodka, Amaretto, ice, soda (7-up, sprite)

    Beautiful Ladies in the Egg Tree House
    Malibu® coconut rum, pineapple juice, orange juice, splash half-and-half, splash grenadine syrup

    • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 1:06 pm

      Ohhhh, me wants a Flip Flop:)

      • Posted by Pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 1:27 pm

        You’ll need it after watching that Jodi Arias movie…for the 3rd time. LOL!

    • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 25, 2013 at 1:33 pm

      Best concoctions ever pfenix, I think I will require one SPF 100, followed by a frosty Moon-Bather’s-Delight. After that, we’ll see!!

    • Phenix!! Very cool, I’ll take one of each please, it’s been a long fricking day at the car dealers and lots of money down the flusher to boot.

      • Posted by pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 6:39 pm

        Getting the car fixed or did you have to buy new one? I have felt that pain! You can have all you want…and all top shelf. Here is two more:

        Wish I could Bomb the Car
        1 oz Bailey’s® Irish cream
        1 glass Guinness® stout
        1 oz whiskey

        Broken Down Car (actually golf cart but best I could find)
        1/2 oz amaretto almond liqueur
        1/2 oz melon liqueur
        1 oz cranberry juice

  39. Posted by Pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 12:21 pm

    Summer and the Drive In Theatre, going with Mom and Dad to see Willie Wonka, later with the boyfriend (smooching up a storm hee, hee)…here are some vintage intermission ads to bring back the memories

    • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 25, 2013 at 1:52 pm

      Pfenix..thanks for the memories! Nothing like a hot night at the drive-in – car bouncing over the raised areas to find just the right spot – parking – then realizing the speaker didn’t work. I was at the drive-in with a carload of girlfriends when they interrupted the movie and made the announcement about the moon landing in 1969. I remember visiting relatives in Chicago and their drive-in showed movies on the front and back of the screen simultaneously which greatly impressed us. Kind of makes me wish we still had them…….

      • Posted by pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 6:50 pm

        YES! Wow that had to be incredible to look up at the moon and know they were there. At 5:47 was the ad that used to play as a child.

        There is a website about the few drive-in’s open in the US and with locations and links.

  40. Posted by Pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 12:36 pm

    My mother was a queen suntan bronzer, now she battles pre-skin and skin cancer. Anyone remember the Bain de Solteil from the 80’s, so wanted to look like that. Luckily I don’t worry about skin cancer and my skin while whitey white, has few wrinkles at my age (or so my mother says)

    • Posted by Ria on June 25, 2013 at 1:07 pm

      My MIL and I were reminiscing about sunbathing in the 80’s, she said her mom would lie on aluminum foil!!! I remember my friends and I using Crisco…nothing like nice crispy brown skin:)

      • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 25, 2013 at 1:41 pm

        And then there was the baby oil formula with iodine. I think Tan Mom was a fan!

        • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 25, 2013 at 1:58 pm

          I’m white as a ghost and suffered nothing but sunburn until I just gave up. Had friends who used the baby oil/iodine but could never figure out the iodine. I burned and went straight for the Noxzema – which still conjures up beach memories for me: bedtime in the beach cottage with no AC – hearing the ocean – clean sheets – and the fragrance of Noxzema. Am afraid to imagine – am in denial – the pre-cancerous spots I surely have.

          • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 25, 2013 at 4:36 pm

            Suntanning for me was my sister and I climbing out my bedroom window to lay on the garage roof (the closer to the sun, the better/darker the tan, right? 😉 while my parents were at work. To this day, NOTHING smells more like summer to me than Coppertone. (w/a hint of warm cedar roofing shingles)

            • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 25, 2013 at 4:50 pm

              Coppertone definitely sparks memories. I was a “Sea ‘n Ski” girl.

              • Posted by pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 6:58 pm

                • Was I the only idiot that tried the very first generation of sunless tanning stuff? I spent two or three weeks looking like a cheeto.

                  • Posted by Pfenix on June 26, 2013 at 9:40 pm

                    Like QT OSW?

                    • Oh yes! That’s the culprit…. Do you remember what it did to your hands, knees and feet? Orangey dirty scrofulous looking——Also, do you remember a makeup-setting spray called PSSSSSST? My mother called our drugstore once to order some, and when she said she wanted some PSSSSSST, the clerk whispered back, What?, and when my mother said again, PSSSSSST, the clerk whispered, It’s okay-you can tell me, is it Kotex? Mom just hung up.

                    • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 3, 2013 at 12:37 pm

                      OSW…I’m still laughing about your mother’s attempt to locate PSSSSST. “Kotex” – another name from the past that fit all feminine hygiene products. I remember when the boxes were disguised with no obvious product name and simple patterns. As a child I thought they were those pre-wrapped packages kids would buy only to discover the treasures inside.

              • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 25, 2013 at 7:49 pm

                OMG I’d forgotten about Sea-n-Ski!! Now THAT has a distinctive smell, very unique, and not easily duplicated.

                Your Eggyness… at the risk of overtaking Carol Sub/Barkeep, or GBPL as the official “pain in your blog’s arse” (no offense ladies! 🙂 ) I was thinking… if the Eggtree Boutique isn’t ready to dole out summer vacay wardrobe hints just yet, perhaps a piece about those little memories we all have from our childhoods? Or better yet, en Eggtree Movie Review of “Dirty Little Secret”!!

                • Posted by Ria on June 26, 2013 at 8:42 am

                  Oh, I’d love Queen Eggo to do a movie review!

                • Posted by Pfenix on June 26, 2013 at 9:44 pm

                  Please! Your one of my favorite pains in the arse and damn funny. Would love if Ms. Eggy would just have a vent tab for JoDie, so we could flip over there and vent on her latest mischief/BS.

                • Posted by GBPL on July 10, 2013 at 8:15 am

                  hey hey HEY!!!!! I just saw I was referred to the “blogs pain in the arse!”
                  LOL!!! too funny!

                  I’ve not been too painful lately…i’ve been too busy to be a pain!! ; )

                  Its all good though Jenn! I was just going thru and watching all the old commericals while i’m on hold for the umpteenth time this week!!!

                  thanks for the chuckle!! 😛

            • Posted by pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 7:00 pm

          • Posted by pfenix on June 25, 2013 at 6:55 pm

            When I worked at a Girl Scout camp during college, we were high in the mountains, and these girls sometimes would just burn, all ethnic groups. Learned to slather on the Noxema, then cover with Aloe Gel. Noxema would instantly cool then down and the Aloe would help keep the area moisturize and cool when the Nox dried. Delicate sponge bath, and start again. We literally had stations of sunscreen EVERYWHERE in camp.

  41. Posted by Cindy Lou on June 25, 2013 at 7:26 pm

    Cougar Alert: Channing Tatum on Letterman tonight, Johnny Depp on Thurs.

    • Posted by GBPL on June 27, 2013 at 11:40 am

      LOL!!! hilarious!..Couger alert!

      Both of those are delicious…Me and Johnny are the same age!!! *wink wink! 😉

  42. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 25, 2013 at 7:55 pm

    LOL If you like him, you HAVE to see the video “I Wanna Channing All Over Your Tatum”!!

  43. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 25, 2013 at 8:01 pm

    • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 25, 2013 at 8:14 pm

      CRAP!! This is exactly why I don’t do links, cuz my Kindle screws it up every time.
      Now THIS is the official video (finally) I made SURE this time! Delete the other ones for me please, Egg?

      • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 25, 2013 at 8:29 pm

        Yes, Channing IS the best! Thanks, that was hilarious, hadn’t seen it before..and coincidently, Jamie Fox is on Letterman tomorrow, so it’s kinda a Channing, Jamie, Johnny sandwich. And I can’t link on my kindle either, the results have been crazy, it’s like trying to tap dance on a postage stamp!

        • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 26, 2013 at 11:16 am

          Thanks for that, I feel better somehow knowing I’m not the only one! You may end up the lone Kindle user when I get frustrated and throw mine out the window though!

  44. Posted by Pfenix on June 26, 2013 at 9:55 pm

    Found a 1971 Maybelline Summer Eye Collection ad, ooooh light sea blue. Or how about a 1983 L;Oreal summer collection…more blue, and I’m worth it!

  45. Posted by Pfenix on June 26, 2013 at 10:07 pm

    O.K. can anyone tell me how Dippity Do worked? Did you use the gel and let it dry and then comb out. Was it like a pre-mousse? I remember it came in green and pink goo, and I would get in trouble for playing with it at my grandma’s. .

    • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 27, 2013 at 4:36 am

      Was a “setting gel: used on wet hair before rolling (before heated curlers). Used it once at a friend’s house and my hair was a stiff mess – could hardly comb through.

  46. Posted by Pfenix on June 26, 2013 at 10:17 pm

    O.K, O.K. just one more (before I get spanked). Remember my family members getting these in the 70’s, hated the spikes when they dolled my hair up. Also they burned your fingers, so I stuck to curling irons. It’s only in the last two years I purchased the Top Styler hot clam shells. Shame on me!

    • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 27, 2013 at 4:41 am

      A friend received the first version for Christmas. She tried to tell me on the phone how they worked and me being a very concrete thinker at the time thought each curler remained plugged in during the entire process. If you left them in too long you’d get dents in your scalp. The set included small rubber pieces that you could put under rollers near skin to protect from burning.

      All these wonderful beauty tips make me want to head to the shower and then have a major primping session!

  47. Posted by Marnie Paige on June 27, 2013 at 4:51 am

    Now Phenix has me thinking about more beauty techniques from my past like Cutex flavored lipstick (I liked Grape – a pale purple that most likely made me look ill or embalmed) – hairspray (a daily staple for sure – “Aqua Net”) – teased hair (older, much more savy girls did it and had the “beehive” shape). Rumor on the school bus had it that one girl kept her hair in that style without combing or washing indefinitely and bugs set up residence! “French curls” – hair teased, sprayed, and formed into large curls – a style most of us wore to formal dances where we looked nothing like ourselves. This era was followed by the “natural” look – straight hair (some would actually iron their hair – not curling iron but clothes iron on the ironing board)

    • Posted by Ria on June 27, 2013 at 8:33 am

      My friends older sisters would talk about ironing their hair during the 70’s! I can’t imagine doing that! I had a huge lip gloss addiction and had about 20 different flavors. One Christmas I got Avon lipgloss in a red lip case, I loved that thing!

      • Posted by GBPL on June 27, 2013 at 11:44 am

        Loved it too!!! ooooooh remember the “Kissing potions” roll on gloss…. and the “Lip Lickers” in the metal tin…that those blasted things would get so stuck..

        Then what were the big fat ones…”Lip Smackers?” that had the flavors of soda?!?!

        • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 27, 2013 at 3:10 pm

          Funny you should mention “Lip Smackers” because I was JUST looking at them in the drugstore a few days ago! I was going to buy some for my niece, but I remember someone told me years ago that those type of lip balms (even chapstik) have so much wax in them, they end drying your lips out. (then you need more lip balm) I love my niece and don’t want to give her something that says ” I don’t CARE if your lips get so dry you can’t speak.” (though my sister might like that) LS tasted the best out of ALL lip products, which almost made it worth having an “old person” crusty kisser when you ran out. The idea was not to run out…thus the many “gift sets” sold around every major (or Hallmark) holiday in 99% of drugstores. (my favorite is grape) Oh the good old days!

        • Posted by Pfenix on June 27, 2013 at 3:21 pm

          Bonnie Bell Lip Smackers!!!! For the queens of middle school!

      • Here, here, Ria, watch who you’re calling old missy. I used to iron my elbow length hair even though it was stick straight to begin with. I liked the split ends it gave me for extra added fullness. 😉

        • Posted by Cindy Lou on June 27, 2013 at 3:00 pm

          Added fullness is a good thing, but too much fullness, not. Tried to tame my unruly thick tresses with a big round styling brush and a blow dryer. The brush got stuck wound clear up to my scalp, and couldn’t get it unstuck. Had to drive cross town with a hair brush stuck to my head, crying my eye balls out the whole way. It took two hairstylists about an hour to get it undone. I nearly had to have a Willmott sizes bald spot x10 shaved on the side of my head..can laugh about it now though..!!

          • Posted by GBPL on June 27, 2013 at 4:17 pm

            LOL!!! “Wilmott size bald spot” is going to be the 2013 coined phrase!!

            In all my years of hairdressing, i’ve never had anyone come with a brush stuck in there hair!! Pooor thing!

            I’ve had one poor soul that had a basketball size mat on her head… and that is not exaggerating. This mat was so big and heavy that her hairline was beat red.
            In her defense she was bed ridden for a spell, but there was NOTHING that I could of done for her. I couldn’t even get a tail of a comb under that mat.
            She needed to go to the Dr. to get it shaved off.

            Her husband actually called for an appt. for her,…with no mention of the conditon of her hair. He wanted me to give her a perm.

            Can you imagine my shock when she came in with a big fur coat and flip flops….in JULY! So there were more issues than the mat on her head unfortunately. 😦

            So I’ll see your stuck brush Cindy Lou and raise you a hair mat!!! 😉

            • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 28, 2013 at 3:26 am

              I too got a round brush stuck in my hair when attempting to blow dry and add fullness. Was nearly at the point of having to call in sick to work as the clock ticked and I couldn’t get the brush to budge. Had to work a strand of hair at a time and finally got it out. Maybe that is just what happened to Wilmott! Too funny. Man..that big nasty mat..can’t iimagine something like that.

    • Posted by Pfenix on June 27, 2013 at 3:34 pm

      Oh, so you were a HAIR HOPPER? That reminds me of Hairspray…the orginal.
      “How do you get hair….so straight?”
      “I iron my hair. I play my bongo’s, listen to Odetta, and IRON my hair”.

  48. Posted by Cindy Lou on June 27, 2013 at 4:14 pm

    RE: Pfenix request for “vent tab” for Jodie, there have been previously closed sidebar discussions released and reported that detail information about Jodie “squeezing and slapping” pets, that Juan tried to bring in under Laviollette cross exam. Very telling and incriminating stuff. Can’t link well for you on kindle, but if interested, go to AZ Central, and find link to Arias trial updates..grrrrrr!

    • Posted by pfenix on June 28, 2013 at 12:12 am

      Also interesting info. and pix at Juan Martinez vs. The Fog, Facebook page. Can read a lot without having to sign in. They hate her so much over there that they refer to JoDie as her inmate number only. Cute pix of JM of course because they are hard core Juanitas.

  49. Posted by Lulu's Mom on June 28, 2013 at 6:14 pm

    So I am now convinced that I was the one that started the punky spiked hair look way back in 1966. I was a teen tom girl, all about sports and boys but not big on beauty routines. Prom time and I wanted sooooo much to be a pretty girly girl. Bought a hot pink empire dress with a train (the store hemmed it about 6 inches too short), dyed a pair of white shoes pink with that Esquire stuff that always flaked off, made an appointment at the Polk a Dot salon to have my pixie hair done and went to Woolworths and bought the best silver eye shadow and hot pink lipstick they had. At the salon I insisted on French curls even though my hair was about two inches long. The result was a head full of commas. Went home, put on the dress with the train that looked more like a tail, jumped into those flaky pink shoes, smudged silver eyeshadow all over my eyelids and last but not least pulled on those white elbow length gloves. Waited for my guy who gave me a lovely carnation corsage and off we went. When we got to the dance, an old boyfriend saw me, came over and told me I looked like a pork sausage…I was devastated but now I think he was being kind

    • Posted by pfenix on June 28, 2013 at 8:00 pm

      Polk a Dot Salon…I love it!!!! Your ex-boyfriend was being a jealous jerk…this is why the loser wasn’t taking you to the prom.

    • Posted by pfenix on June 28, 2013 at 8:11 pm

      Here is a 1966 prom, did yours look like this LM?

      • Posted by Lulu's Mom on June 29, 2013 at 5:31 am

        Thanks for the memories, how very kind of you and yes it could have been my prom fortunately I was not in the film… coma heads in site! The beauty of youth is that you recover really fast. The next year I was a vision of sophistication at the prom. White simple dress with a black sash around the waist. Had my date get me a corsage of daisies that I wore at my waist in the back where the sash was tied. No Poke a Dot salon or silver eye shadow or gloves. Have been a fashionista ever since. So if I hadn’t been called out on my pork sausage look who knows?

        • Posted by pfenix on June 29, 2013 at 10:56 am

          Your second outfit sounds just lovely and chic, nice follow up.

          • Posted by Lulu's Mom on June 29, 2013 at 12:56 pm

            Thanks pfenix…having created a disaster the year before made me devote some think time to what would be a good look versus just following the crowd. Have watched the video of the prom twice now….just priceless!

        • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 29, 2013 at 2:04 pm

          Second go round sounds very chic! Love the idea of daisies and wearing them in the back. Very creative. In spite of my fever-blister prom and half done hair my boyfriend wore his Army dress blues and was quite a hit – so the focus was on him. The next opportunity for him to wear his blues with me was 19 yrs later when we reconnected and we went to a friend’s beautiful wedding in DC. For that event there was no fever blister and I wore a little black dress – had good hair – and even had my eyelashes dyed! Quite an improvement over the prom look.

          • Posted by Pfenix on June 29, 2013 at 8:01 pm

            Something about a man in uniform. Used to work at a War Memorial and when the Navy had an event in those white dress uniforms…sigh…just yummy.

            • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 30, 2013 at 8:15 am

              Same here. I worked at a Naval Hosp for a while and NEVER got tired of those uniforms. Something about the way the trouser legs fell just so that would have the civilian women standing in doorways as large groups walked by. We all lusted. A small Navy honor guard would practice outside my office window weekly. I lived for that bright spot in my routine. No other word besides yummy!

          • Posted by Pfenix on June 29, 2013 at 8:46 pm

            Used to joke about this…

            • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 30, 2013 at 8:18 am

              That’s it….I’m heading to the closet to pull out my husband’s old uniforms….especially since he’s greatly annoying me today and I need a change of attitude. Maybe the uniforms will help me snap out of it.

    • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 29, 2013 at 5:19 am

      Your look sounds a little like mine – French curls – elbow length white gloves. I had a few other fashion mishaps though. The week before my boyfriend (now husband) and I went to the beach. I was sporting a huge fever blister by the day of the festivities – so no lipstick was possible. A neighbor did my hair – that I’d set myself and then sat under a “hat” hairdryer. I lost patience waiting for my very thick hair to dry so when my friend tried to style it damp the curls were a huge flop and looked like long commas – probably a longer version of yours, Lulu’s Mom. Young love trumped my floppy hair and fever-blistered look., The highlight of the evening was the music – “The Drifters” and their under the boardwalk and up on the roof tunes. Unfortunately I should have remained under the boardwalk prior to the prom and I wouldn’t have suffered the fever blister.

  50. Posted by jennIferlyn on June 29, 2013 at 5:00 am

    My sister and I BOTH had sets of “Lock & Roll” curlers (& Caboodles!!) and I HATED THEM!! (the curlers. I LOVED my Caboodle! ) Even if by some miracle I managed to get the things in my hair WITHOUT burning off the first 2 layers of skin on my fingertips, I was still at risk of sporting a “circus clown” ‘fro, because having long, thick hair made it near IMPOSSIBLE to get the ends curled w/the rest of my hair. Half the time I used them I’d have fluffy curls…with the last 2″ of hair STICK STRAIGHT. Not a good look on anyone…especially ME.

  51. Posted by Lulu's Mom on June 29, 2013 at 12:53 pm

    I’m still thinking about Marnies fever blister and how some gals wouldn’t even go to the prom…….good sense of self Marnie! Sounds like you had a great time. So on to these lock and roll rollers not sure what they were did you heat them on the stove or what?

    • Posted by Pfenix on June 29, 2013 at 8:04 pm

      No, they were popular in the 1990’s. Couldn’t find a commercial or I would have posted it but you can find vintage sets on sale online. Jenniferlynn or Eggy could describe them better.

  52. Posted by Marnie Paige on June 29, 2013 at 2:09 pm

    In elementary school there were curlers called “spoolies” that were quite a hit for a while. My grandmother got some and tried them on me as she was always trying to give me curly hair. They were small rubber contraptions that you’d wrap a small amount of hair around and then they’d fold over on themselves. Supposedly comfortable to sleep in. The things we did to try and look good!

    • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 29, 2013 at 8:42 pm

      Lulu’s Mom~ Marnie described the torture device also known as “Lock & Roll” curlers, perfectly. Plus our fearless leader found them on amazon, here’s her link from above, so you can have a look at them if you want :

      • Posted by Pfenix on June 29, 2013 at 8:50 pm

        Can’t figure out how you roll them. Can you give us a short torture tutorial?

  53. Posted by Tracy on June 29, 2013 at 9:43 pm

    I watched the “Dirty Little Secret” movie today. I thought it was pretty good, although the Juan character was just weird. I felt that they captured the essence of Jodi’s stalking behavior very well, and they also make it apparent that Travis’ friends did not like her at all, and that, unlike Travis, she only had one “friend” who even talked to her. That part seemed pretty real. Not every fact was true, but I believe they probably portrayed the emotional aspects of Jodi’s and Travis’ relationship well. Anyone agree?

    • Posted by Pfenix on June 30, 2013 at 12:10 am

      Well I couldn’t bring myself to watch the movie, but others talked about it earlier in this blog. The wigs were truly awful. The only JA show I have enjoyed is this one…

      • Posted by Sharon on June 30, 2013 at 5:27 am

        Too funny!

      • Posted by Marnie Paige on June 30, 2013 at 8:24 am

        Now THAT should have been shown on Lifetime. Love the real knives in the prison cafeteria and the pic of the killer leaving “grandpa’s” house with gun in hand.

        • Posted by pfenix on June 30, 2013 at 10:54 am

          or how she will teach premeditation instead of meditation to prisoners, and the shirts. ROFLAO when I watched this!

          • Posted by jennIferlyn on June 30, 2013 at 1:38 pm

            Just covered my Kindle screen with the (partially flat) Coca Cola I was drinking… but the cleanup was well worth it! The amount of talent some people posses amazes me. (wish I was that creative)

            Pfenix- to use “Lock and Roll” curlers is just like reg ones (I assume, as I never had any) Once the “rollers” are hot enough to scald flesh, you take sections of hair and wrap it around the curler, but instead of pinning or clamping them in to cool, the upper portion of the “silicone curlers of death” folds over the wound section of hair, keeping them in place, but also keeping the curler warmer, longer, to get curls that last. (see video above) Your basic beauty nightmare!

            • Posted by Pfenix on June 30, 2013 at 7:32 pm

              Ewww…I’ll take my Top Styler clam shells.

              • Premix, this is so funny. Much better than Dirty Little Secrets. Where in the world did you find it? Jenniferlyn I agree, some people are so creative but I’m not one of them.

                • Posted by pfenix on July 1, 2013 at 3:24 pm

                  Was looking for any new funny videos on and this popped up. Should look to see if they have done more.

  54. Posted by Barb on June 30, 2013 at 6:58 am

    Love this! Too funny. Especially the references to meditation and premeditation!

    • Posted by pfenix on June 30, 2013 at 11:16 am

      LILO needs a long OVERHAUL at the Egg Tree Salon and Spa for sure! Just no trips to the bar for her, she couldn’t even handle being a viral drinker! She would crash her computer!

      Healthy=work, Can’t sell your clothes LILO if your constantly in court, rehab, jail, house arrest, or pulled over on the side of the road drunk/coked off you arse, right? If she is so desperate for money…clean your act up, and stay away from your parents! But Momma likes to party and live vicariously riding her children’s coat tails.

  55. Posted by pfenix on July 1, 2013 at 3:40 pm

    Here are two more videos by Lego magic who did the Lego Jodi trial. Funny, think the mitigating factor is the best. Enjoy chicks and peeps!

  56. Posted by Cindy Lou on July 1, 2013 at 4:55 pm

    Good find, pfenix!

    • The Lego trial is great! I can’t imagine there will be a Lego Zimmerman trial. Is anyone else out there as bothered by this trial as I am? The most telling aspect of all this is that I am hesitating to say exactly what it is that is bothering me. I am going to say it anyway, because I am tired of everyone feeling intimidated to speak an opinion. (Not here, I hope). I think George Zimmerman is probably guilty of horrible judgement and negligence, but NOT second degree murder.The witnesses so far have helped the defense, and I feel this trial and charge are because of racial fear. Yes, I am from the south, but I also stood with the first black students bussed into my high school. Being held hostage by threats of racial violence is not what Dr. King fought for, and died for as well.I am sad for us all. Thanks for letting me vent.

      • Yes, I am bothered by it as well. I think as you do that Zimmerman is guilty of very bad judgement and possibly manslaughter but I do not believe it was second degree murder. He shouldn’t have followed that boy and should have left it up to authorities. I also believe Travon Martin had a right to defend himself as well. I dont think this would have become such a racial issue had the police acted faster: had the Reverands Sharpton and Jackson not interjected themselves into it and had there not been so much media attention. I don’t see how the prosecution can win this because their case is just not there unless it turns around fast. I am concerned a “Not Guilty” verdict will cause a lot of racial tension. It is after all an all white ( one Hispanic) ) jury and all female. You know someone is going to make this verdict a race thing.

      • Posted by pfenix on July 2, 2013 at 12:16 am

        Your right OSW, there is nothng entertaining or over the top on this trial.
        Zimmerman is guilty for being an stupid overzealous neighborhood watch cop-wanna-be. Correct that, EXTREMELY STUPID for not listening to the police when they told him to STOP following him, and NOT confront him

        Trayvon was freaked out about this guy stalking him, and Zimmerman was freaked out about his false assumption that Trayvon just HAD to be one of the robbers in the neighborhood. Zimmerman confronts him and a fight breaks out, but Zimmerman had the gun and thats what happens in tragedies like this. 2nd degree murder fits but so does voluntary manslaughter Whatever the verdict, dumbo needs to do jail time.

        It is my understanding that the community they were in has had problems with racial profiling and the police; so there might have been already racial tension there to begin with. It feels like no one is going to win here, and how to you help the community heal and move forward in a more positive direction?

      • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 2, 2013 at 2:16 am

        OMGoodness those Lego videos are hilarious! The stilted computer voices are perfect for the ridiculousness that trial has become. (I bet Martinez is forced to take a plea)

        As for the Zimmerman trial, I agree with all 3 of you, OSW, Reba, & Pfenix. IMO the DA’s hand was forced, and they overcharged it w/2nd Degree Murder. Regardless of the outcome however, I too, am concerned about racial tensions exploding in the aftermath. (a’la Rodney King, circa 1992)

        • I have always been amazed that so much blind hate, violence, pain, subjugation, and separation is the result of the level of pigment in the superficial layer of a human’s skin. It is something I’ll never be able to understand. I think both Zimmerman and Martin displayed the classic symptoms of Testosterone Poisoning. Everybody has to be the tough guy. At my age it is so predictable and frankly tiring. When I taught school, I never had any issues in my classes arising from skin color—I had issues with aided and abetted ignorance. It’s what my granny called “trashy and trifling” . Stupidity has no color–trust me.

          • Posted by pfenix on July 2, 2013 at 10:39 am

            Trash and trifling…ahh a granny’s wisdom. Great points again OSW!

            It makes me think of Charles Dickens – The Christmas Carol when the Ghost of X-mas Present lifts his robes and shows Scrooge the two children…Ignorance and Want (Girl)…
            “Beware them both, and all of their degree, but most of all beware this boy, for on his brow I see that written which is Doom, unless the writing be erased”

        • Posted by pfenix on July 2, 2013 at 10:53 am

          Laughed hard at the juror who said he googled Wilmott’s hair and would that get him dismissed, and the judge telling Wilmott to sit down.

          I was in LA in 1992, and drove through rioting as it started south of my neighborhood, then fled up into the Sunset hills, then came back down to retrieve our neighbors, a mom with two girls who I regretted in leaving behind. Luckily they fled after seeing me pack up my car with suitcases. Watch the city burn as I crawled up Fairfax to Sunset Blvd. Pray that it never happens in this case.

          • I can’t imagine what it was like to have really been there-it was bad enough on TV. How could violence help anyone’s cause to be viewed in a more favorable light? I was disturbed over the years in education, that more and more students felt entitled to grades, free stuff, and every year that passed I noticed a marked lack of shame. The kids are not ashamed of bad behavior, and manners are a thing of the past. One of my big ole boys in my class came in from lunch and let out a frog-strangling burp. I said, “What do you say?” He said, “That was a goodun!” Crassness is glorified,violence makes the headline, and all God’s children want a free phone!

            • OSW you are amazing, wise wise wise and the things you say are priceless. You know, race issues in our country is a wound that won’t heal. I just hope that the people in Fl. Can keep it together, keep it together and let these families try to come to terms with this tragedy and its aftermath. I hope there is not a show of media and social outrage such that we have seen in the past.and hope Al and Jessie keep their mouths shut!

          • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 3, 2013 at 6:02 am

            For the hell of it I googled Wilmott’s hair.

            • Posted by pfenix on July 3, 2013 at 9:25 pm

              Well don’t hold back Marnie! Tell us what you found!

              • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 4, 2013 at 6:50 am

                Nothing significant that would rise to the level of appreciation of us eggers. Backed off my search in the event my computer activity would be forensically confiscated and I’d have to answer to wondering about that bald spot. Pictured myself on the witness stand having to answer to that. Mind you, I have no legal action pending and am law-abiding but have that hesitancy just in case.

  57. Posted by PinkPamper on July 2, 2013 at 12:55 pm

    It’s been a while since I’ve posted, but just let me say I LOVE my skin. It’s pale, no freckles, no moles. I’ve always avoided the sun. I LOVE being outside, but NEVER have I sunbathed. Who wants sunburn? Age spots? What’s wrong with a porcelain complexion?

  58. Nothing PP! but i bet you have to be very careful do you look your age?

    • Posted by PinkPamper on July 3, 2013 at 7:05 am

      Yes, Reba, I gotta be careful. And I look great for 110 years old! Lol, just kidding! I look awful!

      • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 3, 2013 at 1:08 pm

        Hey PinkPamper…maybe you should try the “breatharian” approach to living healthy.

        • Posted by pfenix on July 3, 2013 at 9:29 pm

          Wasn’t that an infomercial with a blonde lady who said you can breathe the weight off? She had all these breathing exercises…and a book too.

  59. Posted by jennIferlyn on July 3, 2013 at 12:05 am

    If you are looking for something good (and yes, slightly disturbing) to watch on TV, try “Taboo USA” on National Geographic Channel. These people make ME feel “normal”!

    • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 3, 2013 at 6:00 am

      I saw a brief portion of an episode and swear it was about a trend not to eat but to live off air! I still think I heard it wrong….will have to investigate.

  60. In the last article about LiLo she stated that she had seen the error of her ways and was going to lay low for the next year so that she wouldn’t be tempted to party or drink. Now she is whinging that she can’t have a big birthday bash in NY – how shallow!

  61. Posted by Cindy Lou on July 3, 2013 at 6:43 am

    Oh, guffaw, Marnie Paige, that is too funny! Come to think of it I think I came across something on this very elderly sage in India who claimed to have not eaten since 1963 or some such. She was needless to say, quite thin, and I think I heard subsequently that she has passed on.

    • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 3, 2013 at 12:55 pm

      Cindy Lou will be sure to post what my investigation reveals. Might be something those of us who subscribe to the Egg Tree Spa and beauty tricks might want to try, Oxygen? Air? Sure might be better than what’s currently in my kitchen – Snickers – banana pudding – double stuff oreos – and leftover cheese ravioli and gnoochi from a fabulous place in Little Italy (Baltimore).

    • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 3, 2013 at 1:07 pm

      Found it! Breatharians are what these nuts call themselves. “Bretharian Institute of America.” If I was as smart as Egg – or Phenix – or Jenniferlyn – or those of us who can post videos and info from other sites (I’m definitely not but defer to them) I would put something here. These people actually believe that by not consuming any calories – only breathing – they will not only be healthier but beat the time clock of aging and have discovered the age old quest for the fountain of youth. I say we all jump on the bandwagon and forego all former beauty tips mentioned previously. Let’s go right to the heart of the matter and consume only air. I admit I’m giving up my new found desire for instant tan – curly hair – and all else Egg suggested in her post announcing the spa. It’s air only for me! Will keep you all posted as to my progress.

      • Posted by PinkPamper on July 3, 2013 at 1:25 pm

        Hells Bells Marnie! Lol, today keeps getting better! The BREATHARIANS!!! I gotta check this crew out! I love “light food”!! It’s days like this I wish my Mom was still alive; her analysis of the BREATHARIANS would have been priceless.

        • Air, huh? Precious codger and I went to DR. for weigh-ins today. Mind you I am in charge of the cuisine around our trough. Same food, he eats more cause he’s a big guy. Bottom line-he lost 25 lbs, I lost 3. I can guarantee you that if I joined the BREATHARIANS I would gain 10 lbs and have a terminal wind problem to boot. Life is not fair to women.

      • Posted by pfenix on July 3, 2013 at 9:35 pm

        Remember reading a vintage Raggedy Ann and Andy book (which is usually chock full of them dolls eating usually eating cakes, candies, cookies, you know the best c words) where they were lost and hungry and they made “air sandwiches” some animal doll was showing them how to cut out squares of air and made sandwiches.

        Is that like their children’s version?

      • Posted by pfenix on July 3, 2013 at 9:46 pm

  62. Posted by PinkPamper on July 3, 2013 at 11:01 am

    I’ve needed a good laugh for a while now and the Lego vid had me screaming out loud! The “Premeditated” tee shirt!!!!!!! How clever is this person!!! But I must admit it took me back to when the schrew pulled that disgusting stunt with the tee shirt. I will always believe that she did that TO the Alexanders, just to hurt them some more. She’s a rotten, evil, black hearted demon. And those are her good traits.

  63. Posted by jennIferlyn on July 3, 2013 at 1:40 pm

    As much as I want to see Stabby face a punishment phase retrial, it will take FOREVER to properly horrify the next 11 people & 1 schmuck who aren’t smart enough to get out of jury duty. (esp when it’s fairly certain that the unfortunate “jury of Stabby’s peers” playing in THIS finale round will be sequestered!) And though it’s obvious that Martinez is more than ready to go to battle again, I’m not so sure the economy makes it feasible. They already topped $1.5 MIL trying to snuff out that narcissistic bag of bones…I think they have to seriously consider a plea, but for nothing less than LWOP. I hope. I cannot deal w/the idea of Stabby EVER being part of society again, even if that age progression pic showed us what a complete HAG she will be in 20 years!

    OK, here I go AGAIN with post ideas. How about an Independence Day Firework Safety Lesson? You could include something about STUPID A**HATS in dry areas (SURROUNDED BY TREES!!) will ALWAYS be the ones to get illegal fireworks and put on a show to impress the neighbors. Then end up in the ER with only 8 fingers. I will then print out your post, and tape it to my (stupid, a**hat) neighbor’s front door tonight. Just a suggestion. (or a plea for mercy! lol) 😉

    • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 3, 2013 at 2:03 pm

      Last August their son was home from COLLEGE and disposed of the hibachi coals IN THE YARD WASTE PILE. (then left for dinner!) Dumba** almost burnt our house down!

      • Posted by pfenix on July 3, 2013 at 10:20 pm

        If someone is setting off fireworks off the back patio and they say “OOPs”. Check it out…especially the roof. Keep your garden hose handy and ready to go. Just sayin’.

    • Posted by PinkPamper on July 3, 2013 at 5:24 pm

      I don’t believe another jury will render a DP verdict. I wish they would come up with a deal and give her LWOP. My first preference is DP, because she richly deserves it. But, if 12 people who convicted her of M1, then agreed with the cruelty factor couldn’t bring themselves to vote DP, how does anyone think they’ll come up with 12 who will? I just want her to go away and never ever have another good day to enjoy. Oh, and I hope her hair falls out. I don’t like the thought of some poor soul having that killers DNA on their person; they could become evil by osmosis.

      • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 3, 2013 at 6:03 pm

        ROFL too funny! Yeah, like someone needing a “Locks of Love” wig doesn’t have enough problems already!!

    • Posted by pfenix on July 3, 2013 at 10:15 pm

      Why don’t we send Stabby out to battle those wildfires in Arizona in shackles since she wants to be so helpful in prison. Or test the firework duds with no fire gear or ear plugs. Or plant a cactus garden in the triple digit heat. Get her working.

  64. Happy Fourth of July all you peeps!! 🙂 Keep it real!

    • I second that, Carol. Precious Codger and I are going to break out the BenGay later and celebrate!

      • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 4, 2013 at 3:46 pm

        Me three! Everyone enjoy yourselves, and watch out for the idjits who truly believe they really DO drive better when drunk. This is WA’s first July 4th since legalizing marijuana, so newbie indulgers will likely be the victim of some interesting firework injuries that beg the question, “How on earth did you DO that?”

        • Posted by pfenix on July 4, 2013 at 8:08 pm

          Ditto here. Let me guess jenniferlyn, they drink, smoke the dope, get the munchies, find the firecrackers and mistaken the bright color packaging for kids candy. Start chewing on the firecrackers and then light up a joint or cig and blow out their teeth.

  65. Just saw a clip of Dr. Demarte had forgotten just how good she was.

    • Posted by pfenix on July 5, 2013 at 7:00 am

      and Jennifer Willmott reminds me of the bitchy wife in The Hangover. What do you think?

      • Posted by GBPL on July 10, 2013 at 8:39 am

        wow Pfenix… you NAILED this!!! I’m imagining Willmott is more like this in real life!!! lol
        I love when she grabs his mouth!!! awesome!!! 😀

    • Posted by PinkPamper on July 7, 2013 at 2:41 pm

      Wow, Reba! I can’t believe it! I’ve been watching Dr. deMarte too! I think I’m in some kind of withdraw. I needed a fix and watching her was just what the doctor ordered! It was like a double scoop of my fav ice cream! Willmott made a bigger ass of herself than she already is, and Dr. deMarte was better than Death by Chocolate! The cherry on top is knowing that the killer got her due. Happy Happy!!! I’m gonna go have some breyers coffee ice cream to celebrate!!! Later, I might get dressed and say howdy to all the wonderful creatures outside! It is such an awesome time of year here in Lancaster County, PA. Flowers, horses, everything is in it’s full beauty! Happy Fourth of July weekend and happy summer to all!

  66. Posted by Cindy Lou on July 5, 2013 at 10:42 am

    Hope you all had a safe and happy 4th, chicks and peeps!!

  67. Posted by jennIferlyn on July 6, 2013 at 4:49 am

    I’d totally forgot about this until I was channel surfing, and came across “Fight Club” last weekend…right at the part when Edward Norton’s character convinces Helena Bonham Carter’s “Marla Singer” character to leave. Just before “Marla” gets on the bus, she stops and says to Norton “You’re the worst thing that ever happened to me.” I thought Travis had come up with that piercing insult on his own! Regardless, he likely never spoke truer words to Stabby the entire time she was his “backdoor bootycall”

    Stabby supporters (like athletic supporters, only completely useless and 100 times more irritating) continue to b*tch, whine, and complain about the verdict, the aggravation factor, etc. I’m sure the shrill, high frequency shrieks of indignation will get louder the closer we get to the punishment redo. At least Martinez got to see what played well to the jury, and what didn’t…but so did the Stabby Einstein Brain Trust. Heavy filed a motion to vacate the finding that Travis’ murder was “especially cruel”, and though it makes me nauseous to say it, his argument seems to have merit. (but I’m not a judge)

    Hope everyone enjoyed the holiday, and still have all 10 fingers!

    • Posted by pfenix on July 6, 2013 at 9:51 pm

      Of course Wormi is going to try any legal BS to continue to help Jodi so he doesn’t get accused of poor counsel (remember he just started his new firm in the middle of the trial). Doubt that it will stick, it doesn’t have much merit.

      Really I wouldn’t give any more time to JoDie’s Shinanigans. She lives in her own fantasy la-la land, and got addicted to her own idea of fame She doesn’t deserve one more minute of fretting from any of us until they the last phase starts again.

  68. Posted by pfenix on July 8, 2013 at 10:31 pm

    Hello and welcome to the Egg Spa and Eggercise Studio Chicks and Peeps. We have a special treat this week after a long holiday weekend; our guest fitness expert is the one and only Suzanne Sommers and her famous fitness equipment, the Thigh Master. Where you can squeeze, squeeze, squeeze you way to shapely thighs.

    Now let’s give a slow clap welcome to Ms. Sommers….


    • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 9, 2013 at 6:43 am

      Slooooooow clapping. And don’t forget that belt that gave an electrical jolt periodically to rid us of belly fat.

      • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 9, 2013 at 6:46 am

        And never forget those images from I Love Lucy…..the big box to sit in with just your head poking out to sweat away the fat. Wish I knew what the wide belt that went around one’s rear end to shake away the fat was called. That one was quite a gem also.

      • Marnie I am living proof that those things did not work! I think the narrow belt with the jolt was called an Abtronic? I don’t remember the “box” but do remember a solid vinyl suit like sweat pants and sweat shirt you wore to exercise and sweat in – the wide shake belt I could only do at a gym – sort of set up like treadmills are nowadays.
        I think my “eye candy” days are over and now I’d be more like an “eye jolt from outer space” – I really related to OSW’s comments about her neon muu-muu!

        • Posted by pfenix on July 9, 2013 at 10:41 am

          Abtronic and later Abronic 2X…so popular it sold worldwide and here is the proof.

          Shock, Shock, Shock your way to a tighter AB!

        • Posted by pfenix on July 9, 2013 at 10:53 am

          upgraded modern version…yeah right…I could also post videos I found on how to wrap yourself in Saran Wrap too…um NO!

  69. Thx for that Phenix! I think I had the cheap black vinyl version of the swelter suit – just the thought of it in this summer heat now makes me think I must have been desperate! Might as well have worn a black garbage bag for all the good it did! LOL…Yup Abtronic and of course I did try the Thighmaster – but us gals used to have a jingle “I must – I must – I must develop my bust!” When we used it in high school prior to having developed much bust – or any self confidence either –
    I’ve been mostly checked out due to preparations for a big family wedding this coming weekend – but love to check back and see what’s up in the egghouse – We had a massive flood here about 3 weeks ago – still many people not able to go home for perhaps a year or more –

    • Happy Independence day!!!!this is my real day of freedom= all family gone home, no cooking or cleaning, and I won’t have to look a wiener in the eye (so to speak) until Labor Day! Does any body remember the Carb Blocker pills that were the rage in the 80’s? They may still be around so beware……I cannot describe the horror of where those blocked carbs went and the speed with which they went there. One of the great freedom days of my life was when I tossed the last pair of control top panty hose in the trash. It was right after my new/old hubby told me I was built for comfort, not for speed.
      Bring on the neon muu-muus!

      • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 9, 2013 at 6:34 pm

        That sounds scarily similar to the fat blocker “Xenical” (now sold OTC as “Ally”, also found in some “baked” potato chips and other lowfat products as “Ollestra”) Ohhh the HORRORS of that particular weight loss “trend”! I’d call it an “additive”, but that implys a positive outcome, and the only thing thing I’m “POSITIVE about, is that you’re going to be crapping out 1/3 of the fat grams from the fast food value meal you couldn’t say “no” to if you take that stuff! What we put ourselves through to be ” beautiful”!!

        • Posted by Pfenix on July 10, 2013 at 3:04 pm

          As for crapping, isn’t one of the warning signs that you can have slippage or uncontrolled oily diarreah? Block those carbs and bring on the Depends!

  70. Posted by Cindy Lou on July 9, 2013 at 5:25 pm

    While we are on the subject of dietary blasts from the past, I’ll share one that my Mother favored. It was a box of individually wrapped chocolate “reducing” candies called Aids. They were supposed to be a delicious appetite suppressant, in truth they tasted vile with a horrible vitamin minerally after taste that didn’t deter my sister and I from scarfing them by the handfuls. A few short years later, when the horrible Aids epidemic began it’s rampage, those candies were mercifully pulled from the shelves and never heard from evermore..

    • Oh, I remember those things…….I ate them too. However I still suffer from PTSD after eating a whole block of chocolate Ex-Lax at the beach one summer. I felt like I was trailing about 10 feet of colon for several days. Why did I do that? My sister gave it to me and said it was candy. My parents were not amused.

    • Posted by GBPL on July 10, 2013 at 8:48 am

      They were even wrapped like decadent chocolates! LOL!!
      My friend and I ate them by the handfuls too,….only because we had the “munchies”!!

    • Posted by Pfenix on July 10, 2013 at 3:20 pm

      Mmmmm you memories sound so yummy…ugh! Yup, I found it, the old commercials.

      Wow down to a size 10 in the 80’s, now it’s down to a size 0 today!

      From the 70’s, love her look!!! Yes I want to look like the side of the box!

      • Posted by Cindy Lou on July 10, 2013 at 3:56 pm

        Thanks pfenix, I need to link this to my sister, she’ll die, LOL. Haven’t seen those candies in years!

      • Posted by Marnie Paige on July 10, 2013 at 4:56 pm

        I hate to admit to this. A girlfriend and I tried these – the mint flavored ones, and ate the ENTIRE box at one sitting! Thankfully we had no over the top side effects.

      • Posted by GBPL on July 10, 2013 at 7:15 pm

        wow!! cringe worthy advertising!

        Don Draper would go on a bender seeing that one presented!

        Pfenix…you never fail to keep us amused! 😛

  71. Posted by Pfenix on July 10, 2013 at 3:29 pm

    O.K, O.K, one more commercial for Figurines…Love the set pieces and the music…Yeah give me those jazz weighloss hands now……

  72. Posted by jennIferlyn on July 10, 2013 at 5:21 pm

    Somewhere in the depth of my closet I still have (pirated) VHS copies of jazzy aerobics with Jane Fonda. Leg warmers, thong leotards (worn OVER spandex shorts!) and headbands abound in these pelvic thrusting, high impact, exercise nightmares. I have vivid memories of attempting to “follow along” (“c’mon girls, it’s EASY!” my arse!) with my sister trying to bend ME into the shapely pretzel-like stretches shown on the tape. (should’ve known “winning” the coin-toss and going first was no prize) It’s amazing what we put ourselves through for “beauty” when you really think about it. All the torturous exercising ON TOP of the skin, hair, and nail rituals and products. Then there are the clothes…about which we need some EggTree fashion advice! 🙂

  73. Posted by Cindy Lou on July 10, 2013 at 5:48 pm

    Let’s just be honest with each other, any of us that ever saw Flash Dance probably has a few pairs of leg warmers lurking in our closet somewhere. But my favorite workout beside “feel the burn” Fonda videos, were those amazing sexy Aerobicise segments on Showtime. I wanted to BE those girls, down to the sexy leotards and the music was hypnotic! I also used those Dexatrim diet capsules, and I don’t know what was in them but I swear, they used to make the roots of my hair vibrate!! But the worst diet ever for me was the Lemonaide diet..others swear by it, but on day 3, woke up so sick I thought I was having an out of body experience!

    • Posted by pfenix on July 11, 2013 at 1:48 am

      That lemonade diet with the B Maple Syrup that your on for 7-10 days. Heard Kanye West asked Kim to do it like his friend Beyoncé does. Have never heard of Aerobicise on Showtime we had HBO only, But Youtube came through again, wow it should have been called Sexercise…

    • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 12, 2013 at 2:53 am

      I remember when that first became popular, because half the women in our office were on it. I draw the line at anything that involves maple syrup, so this disgusting lemonade/cayenne pepper/maple syrup concoction was not passing my lips voluntarily. Just WATCHING people plug their nose and guzzle that for “lunch” was traumatic enough though. (shudder) The memory alone is making me nauseaous.

  74. Eggy, I really need your help! Its raining everyday here these days and even when it is not it is so humid, that my poor hair is just friz, no matter how hard I try. I just have to wear it in clips and pony tails, because it is so unruly. Can you help? :mrgreen:

  75. meant frizz 😳

    • Niecey456, it is so humid here the only thing to do is keep the hair short. Head stays wet with sweat even if your out a short time. Sweat so much, eye make up burns the eyes so bad. But I try to start out looking good. Maybe QueenEgg can help, she can do anything!

    • Posted by pfenix on July 13, 2013 at 4:06 pm

      There are home remedies like the avacado hair masks you can try; if they don’t work you can pull up a chair and some tortilla chips and snack away. Or check out the beauty aisle in your local drugstore for products like these…

  76. Hate to change the subject but the Zimmerman trial is over. It will be what it will be. But y’all, I love this judge. Would love to have seen her preside (spelling?) over Stabby’s trial. I don’t think that trial would have lasted so long! Wormie and Wilma wouldn’t have “Sidebarred” it so much and objections would have been curtailed. Witnesses would have answered questions as asked and explaining or expanding their answers probably would not have occurred. I loved it. When I grow up I want to be a judge and I want to be just like her!!!!! She e en told the lawyers to sit down. Loved it heheheheheeeeeeeeeeeee .

  77. Posted by jennIferlyn on July 13, 2013 at 7:00 pm

    Here comes the verdict…regardless, nothing will bring Trayvon back to his family, and George Zimmerman’s life will also never be the same.

  78. You are right jenniferlyn , no one has won in this case. It is tragic for all involved. Now NAACP calling DOJ to interven. Did you like thes judge?

    • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 13, 2013 at 9:54 pm

      I thought this judge was great. She knew her stuff, and took no one’s sh*t, which would have been wonderful during Stabby’s backassward interpretation of “Sleeping With the Enemy.”

      • I am pleased with the women on this jury.They refused to be bullied into a verdict for which there was no profound evidence.Now I read that Al Sharpton is on his way to Fla. Yep, that’s exactly what this situation needs–a race baiting, opportunistic vampire like Sharpton. I have a friend who is black, and her comment about Sharpton is so apt—He is just plumb embarrassing! If we all got along, Sharpton and his ilk would not have jobs. I am waiting for our esteemed president to stick his nose in this again. In a sea of shameful self-serving people, the brave jury gives me such pride and keeps my embers of hope going for a bit longer. I think Trayvon’s family has been very classy in spite of all the leeches trying to stir things up. I cannot imagine losing my child in such a useless way—–If only George had just stayed in the car…………………….

        • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 14, 2013 at 3:55 pm

          Oh that we could bottle your wisdom, OSW. From your lips to God’s (and society’s!) ears. Now we just need the opinions of Jesse Jackson for the world to be TRULY enlightened. Oh wait, there he is! (I knew he couldn’t keep his two cents to himself)

        • Posted by Pfenix on July 14, 2013 at 4:23 pm

          Sad to say but another child murdered in Florida and another killer freed. Had no expectations or faith of justice in this case. Agreed with OSW, Cop-Wannebe Loser should have listened to police and stayed in his car. Not holding out that dumb George learned his lesson, he probably will think he was justified with slaughter by over zealous stupidity.

          Praying for peace, riots would not honor Trayvon or his family.

          • Posted by Cindy Lou on July 14, 2013 at 6:33 pm

            Too sad there doesn’t seem to be a punishment for the criminally stupid. They walk among us with nary a wrist slap.

            • Most everyone who is demonstrably criminally stupid has at least been rounded up in the same place—-Washington,DC. I heard one of the microphone whores make this statement—It is a crime to kill a child. These are the same people who support late term abortion. Go figure?? I think it is hilarious to have a rally against violence and say stuff like ” I’m gonna kill me some white ass” that’s another head scratcher. More protests are being planned for this weekend, and I want everybody to look carefully at the groups brought in to stir them up. In Oakland, there were the communist workers group, the Occupy folks, you know, the classy ones who pooped on cars and crapped outside restaurant windows when real people were trying to eat.The New Black Panthers will be there and what a tribute to the memory of a dead child that is! The more this kind of behavior goes on, the more divided we become. I will admit to having a gut-level reaction of loathing whenever I see or hear Al or Jesse. Oh God, maybe I am racist! I feel the same way when the most ignorant knuckle-dragger is always sought out by the camera to represent southerners. Maybe I’m not a racist, maybe I’m really a Dumbist.

          • He’s getting his gun back. Probably thinks Not Guilty means he was right. Not so, they just didn’t have the evidence to prove this charge. If I was George, I wouldn’t want to see a gun. Question: was Travon Martins civil rights violated or was this a tragic killing of a child. Am I seeing this wrong?

      • Sleeping with the Enemy? What do you mean?

  79. Hey guys! Is Eggy ok? no posts since mid June?

  80. I know, missing her! Queen Egg are you ok? I am so glad to see my eggTree friends think like I do about Zimmerman verdict. Now DOJ is weighing in. Sharpton and Jackson can only stay relevant when they have something to squak and march about. The only reason Jackson has remained relevant in any way thought the years is because he was with Dr. King when he was assassinated. There is no evidence this was a hate crime so why does the DOJ want to drag this out again especially since the FBI and DOJ have already investigated. Al Sharpton is a parasite and why MSNBC would want this blood sucker around is beyond me. If the NAACP wants something investigated, why don’t they put their funds and people on the ground in Chiicago and deal with shootings there. Zimmerman used little judgement and is responsible for the death of this boy but the charges filed against him were unjust. Had they tried him for a lesser charge, they may have prevailed. The jury has spoken, our system has not failed. These juriors delt with the hand they were given GOOD FOR THEM!

  81. Posted by jennIferlyn on July 15, 2013 at 5:12 pm

    The juror on AC360 is NOT going to go over well with those that don’t believe it was GZ’s voice calling for help on the 911 tapes. 5 of 6 jurors believed it was!!

  82. I feel horrible for the parents of Trayvon….not only is their son dead but they are being used by people who could care less about them or their son. I feel terrible that the Zimmerman family is being threatened by these idiots when they have done nothing. This trial puts a spotlight on how we as human beings have lost sight of our own humanity and compassion and I have no doubt we will pay as a country as well as individuals. Decency is a forgotten attribute and our good country continues to unravel.

  83. Posted by pfenix on July 16, 2013 at 10:29 am

    Peeps and Chicks, Today we have a very very special guest in the Egg Tree Beauty Spa today. One of my favorite actresses of all time is giving a classic eye makeup demonstration…cheer it up for Ms. Elizabeth Taylor.

  84. Thx for that Phenix! Elizabeth Taylor was truly a beautiful woman! I once was leaving a restaurant in Chicago when she and her entourage came in – we passed by each other in the entrance and this short woman was stunning!

  85. Posted by pfenix on July 16, 2013 at 11:31 am

    The ONLY lawyers I want to see on TV is the men and women of SUITS!!!! Yes, it’s FINALLY starts again tonight, and I have been through major withdrawal! To celebrate there are legal drink specials in honor of tonight’s Season 3 starter…enjoy! (Sorry anything Zimmerman is excluded.)

    Straight Law Cocktail: Sherry, Gin

    Legal Joint: Amaretto, Rum, Vodka, Orange juice

    Backstabber: Scotch whisky, Melon liqueur, Irish Mist herbal liqueur

    Yale Cocktail: Dry Vermouth, Gin, Blue Curacao, Bitters

    Harvey Wallbanger: Galliano, Vodka, Orange juice

    Mike’s Chocolate Pudding: Bailey’s, Kahlua, Coke, Cream, Whipped Cream

    Rachel’s Fault: Cherry Liqueur, Vodka, Cranberry and Pineapple juices

    Jessica: Banana Liqueur, Coconut Rum, Strawberry Schnapps, 7-up, Pineapple juice

    Sex With Donna: Vodka, Peach Schnaaps, Lemon Rum, Orange Juice, Gatorade Fruit Punch Energy Drink

    Stuffy in a Suit: Vodka, Blanc Wine, Orange liqueur, Orange bitters, Egg white

    Jack Daniels and Gentleman Jack always available!

    And if you REALLY love to drink and watch Suits, here is the

    Drink whenever:

    1.) Someone holds an intense conversation in the hallway.
    2.) Mike interrupts Rachel in her office and asks “Do you have a sec?” or “Are you busy?” then proceeds to ask her help anyway.
    3.) Mike goes behind Harvey’s back, despite Harvey specifically saying not to.
    4.) Mike or Harvey has a case-winning epiphany (Pro-tip: This usually involves something that was brought-up at the start of the episode).
    5.) Someone references a pop-culture event/character.
    6.) Harvey and Jessica engage in light flirting.
    7.) Harvey and Louis/Mike engage in light bromance.
    8.) Mike and Rachel engage in light flirting. But still no sex.
    9.) Jessica asserts her “Queen Bee” image. (Pro-tip: Comes with a reference to her name “being on the company logo”)
    10.) Louis becomes the antagonist.
    11.) Louis redeems himself and becomes morally ambiguous once again.
    12.) Someone bribes Donna.

    Drink TWICE/ Finish a full glass when:

    1.) Plot reveals Pearson-Hardman is in trouble. Again.
    2.) Plot reveals Mike’s secret is in danger of being exposed. Again.
    3.) Someone in your drinking group points out that Daniel Hardman is actually Gale from Breaking Bad.
    4.) Someone in your drinking group tries to sing the incomprehensible opening song
    5.) Michael Jordan’s name is mentioned.
    7.) Louis’ gold-trimmed nail-cutter comes up.
    8.) Mike screws up his relationship with Rachel (despite it being in the bag).
    9.) Mike smokes a doobie.
    10.) The can-opener is shown.

    Finish the whole bottle when:

    1.) Mike and Rachel finally have sex.
    2.) Donna and Harvey have sex.
    3.) Jessica and Harvey kiss.
    4.) Someone socks Louis in the jaw.

  86. Posted by jenniferlyn on July 16, 2013 at 12:42 pm

    There are too many videos, etc posted here, therefore my computer flat out REFUSES to let me comment on or even READ half the replies! And as CindyLou so aptly described, that “typing on a Kindle is like tap dancing on a postage stamp” I had to break out the laptop to get anywhere on this page today. I thought computers were SUPPOSED to be able to digest and make sense of huge amounts of info, so WTF is wrong? (perhaps it’s that our desktop computer was already being used as a gigantic paperweight when dinosaurs roamed the earth!)

    • Posted by jenniferlyn on July 16, 2013 at 12:44 pm

      No offense meant about the videos, pfenix…I like them! (my computer apparently does NOT!)

      • Posted by pfenix on July 16, 2013 at 2:01 pm

        Nah, Jenniferlyn I hear ya. If I could just post pix instead of videos that would actually make me happier. Very much a “visual” type person if you hadn’t figured it out already!

  87. Posted by jenniferlyn on July 16, 2013 at 1:19 pm

    Am I the only one that thought the “prank” names for the pilots involved in the Asiana Airlines flight that crash landed in SF last week were amusing? Granted, it’s hard to laugh when such a tragedy strikes, but death and dismemberment aside, the rest of this story struck my funny bone just right. As a “news” program, it’s ridiculous that KTVU didn’t bother double checking the names with someone at the NTSB (other than the glorified gopher!) before announcing them on live TV. Of course the obligatory lawsuit has already been promised, though why the airlines is suing KTVU alone, and NOT the NTSB (where the info originated) leaves me scratching my head. More than one person had to be involved IMO, as the “intern” (AKA: currently unemployed) is probably NOT the one who typed the following names into the teleprompters for the talking heads to regurgitate to the drooling masses: “Captain Sum Ting Wong” (and his trusty flight crew) “Holee Fuk”, “Wee Too Low” (and my personal fav) “Ding Bang Ow”.

    I think Asiana Airlines is hoping a lawsuit will overshadow the fact that not only did one of their pilots attempt to take his plane and it’s passengers for a swim in SF Bay, but also the fact that they routinely put pilots in control of aircraft (filled with real live people!) they are wholly unfamiliar with.

    • Posted by pfenix on July 16, 2013 at 2:05 pm

      Trying to blame the intern too is stupid. You are suppose to review their work before it goes out. Reviewers rushed and now are getting spanked for not doing their jobs and everybody wants to finger point. SHEEESH,

      Was cruelty really that funny would be my question. Was rushing through your job worth it?

    • Posted by GBPL on July 16, 2013 at 8:45 pm

      Those were SERIOUSLY the names they put out??? I heard something about it, but didn’t see the names in writing… I must google!

      Jenniferlyn i finally saw waaaaaay up there, where you mentioned me! lol How I flew by that comment so many other times I was on here I don’t know….but I found it! ha!!!!

      That tickled my funny bone!!

      I wanted to jump on here and see if anyone was ranting about JA being back in court today. She looked all too happy to be the center of attention,..even in her stripes.
      The Judge set the new hearing in Aug…wonder what is going to happen then?
      In the meantime, I’m going to revel in my freedom, and taste and enjoy all the things
      she’ll never get to again! : )

  88. Posted by GBPL on July 16, 2013 at 8:56 pm

    Oh my word… I just saw the actual clip. So many people dropped the ball on that one for sure!
    Although definitely ill timed, it is humorous to see the lady reporting it, and actually SEEING the names she’s reading off…wow!
    I can’t imagine what the guys who gave them the names were thinking,…then their reactions when they seen it went to the national news. just WOW.

  89. Posted by GBPL on July 16, 2013 at 9:02 pm

    I forgot to ask about Queen Eggy, and Carol myself!
    You gals are missed!
    I know there’s a little thing called “life” that people gotts to do…so when you have time..
    Pop on!

    • Posted by Ria on July 17, 2013 at 8:18 am

      I miss everyone here!!! I haven’t popped in for a while but I did notice Stabby was back in court…getting ready for round 2 of her penalty phase I suppose! I wonder how long it’ll last.

      • Posted by GBPL on July 17, 2013 at 11:43 am

        When i’m on hold I”ll usually log on and scroll backwards to see if I’ve missed anything,…and to watch any video’s that’s been posted since the last time I’ve checked!

        Sully for one has been MIA for awhile now… Hopefully we’ll hear from everyone sooooon! I can’t wait that long for round 2 of the penalty phase…because the judge is even more unclear as to what the heck is going on!
        I watched Jean DeMarte on Dr. Drew last night…. (I upgraded my pkg for a month to see if its worth it…)
        She couldn’t talk about the Arias case as it was technically still going on…but she did weigh in as to what the cost was as being an “expert witness”
        Which made me #1 re-watch her testimony AGAIN… and it never ceases to amaze me how as Eggy put it…Willmott flipped the bitch switch during that! lol
        Her screeeeechy voice is almost too much….and its amazing to here her try to drill a witness like Juan.!!!!
        #2 re-read again,.. Egg’s take on that part of the trial!!!!…

        Its a sickness I know!!!! : /

        • Posted by Ria on July 18, 2013 at 5:07 am

          I’ll need this blog as my emotional crutch when the penalty phase starts up again! Do you know when it’s supposed to start? Hopefully our Queen Eggo will come up with a new post for it and our bartender will show up to serve cocktails:)

          I haven’t watched Dr. Drew in ages but I did read something somewhere about Dr. DeMarte being on there.

          I did notice Stabby was sporting a high bun in her court appearance the other day.

  90. Posted by jennIferlyn on July 17, 2013 at 2:49 pm

    Yes. it IS a sickness, but you’d think we would have developed SOME sort of immunity from listening to Stabby’s B.S. for 5 months! I guess that makes Stabby and her minions like the Chickenpox…sure, once you’ve had them, you don’t need to worry about getting them again… however, you might wake up 20 years from now to discover you’ve got Shingles instead!

    Also, Stabby’s hairdo made me wonder if she cut her hair (since that “messy bun” can be somewhat deceiving) but then I remembered who I was thinking about, and if Stabby cut her hair, she would make certain everyone KNEW she did, so she could lead everyone to believe she “donated” it. (twisted b*tch that she is!)

    Where are you, Egg? We miss you and your wit! 🙂

    • Posted by Ria on July 18, 2013 at 5:08 am

      Lol jen, I just mentioned the “bun” above! I wonder if she’s still in solitary.

  91. Posted by jenniferlyn on July 17, 2013 at 11:41 pm

    Since Egg is MIA (and I pray she wasn’t sucked into a Stabby Einstein POW Camp, or some equally disturbing vortex of evil) I have a discussion topic suggestion: Commercials. Which ones you like, which ones make you look for something to throw at the TV, and which ones makes you howl with laughter, like you’re reading (rereading?) one of Egg’s fine posts! (and it’s finally become clear to me that I watch WAY too much television!)

    I’ll start with one I can’t stand. It drives me nuts when an ad makes no sense, like Motrin’s tag line: “when you haven’t got time for the pain”. WTF? As if one day when reaching for some headache medicine I may think to myself, “you’re not doing anything today…take some Tylenol instead. You’ve got time for the pain!” STUPID.

    My fav is one for Kraft Mac n Cheese. As the mother’s serving dinner, she dishes out a second dish next to the little sister. The brother isn’t happy, and asks why the sister gets 2 plates of mac n cheese, to which the mother replies, “you had an imaginary friend at that age too”. You then see the little sister scraping her ” imaginary friend’s” plate off onto her own. When she sees her brother glaring at her, she gives him a smirk and says “she’s FULL” (for some reason this commercial makes me giggle every time)

    Lastly, the commercial (or group of them, rather) that brought on this rant in the first place…Vagisil commercials. It’s not bad enough that their tagline is “hail to the V” (and I had to see it more than once before I believed that’s what they were saying) but do they REALLY need to insinuate that if you fail to use their products, not only is EVERYONE going to know, but it will be because they can…(gag) SMELL IT??? Come ON people, take a flying leap into the 21st century! Absolute CRAP! (and THAT you CAN smell!)

    I’d post YouTube footage like Pfenix, but the computer starts smoking and screeching, and giving me electrical shocks with the keyboard when I try to do that….. 😉

    • Posted by Ria on July 18, 2013 at 5:13 am

      There’s some insurance commercial that I can’t stand, a little boy says something in the beginning and I had no idea what he was saying for the longest time until my husband told me…he’s saying “I was earned in Djubouti, Africa, 2002”. He’s cute and everything but the fact that I can’t understand WTH he’s saying annoys me!

      I might be alone on this but I love the Flo Progressive insurance commercials! She cracks me up:)

      I don’t think I’ve seen the Vagisil commercials!

      • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 18, 2013 at 11:37 am

        LOL Ria Thanks for the info, I could only pick out the “Djubouti” part. The little boy is adorable, I just had no clue what the rest of it was. Do you think the kid using sign language is really deaf? It seems more like he was just practicing. (if he IS deaf, he may need to get used to a solitary life, ‘cuz his ASL skills SUCK!) TV… the only place where it’s (almost) OK to make fun of people! The premise of A LOT of commercials are so ridiculous, they almost seem to be asking for it. (or perhaps I was just spot on when I said that 5 mos of Stabby on trial made me MEAN)

    • Posted by pfenix on July 18, 2013 at 4:16 pm

      Hail to the V…makes me think of V the TV mini-series from the 70’s, Does she remove her human face to show she is actually a lizard!!! Here is one V commercial I know you will just love on your smokin’ computer Jenniferlyn.

      • Posted by jennIferlyn on July 18, 2013 at 8:23 pm

        Ewww that is EXACTLY the kind of commercial I was talking about. You rock Pfenix, I knew you’d find it for me!

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